God, LLC

The Coming Technological Singlularity

2011-02-15T13:29:00.001-08:00

The Singularity is something I've been meaning to bring to this forum for some time. What has kept me, I think, is the scope of its implications, and trying to say anything intelligible about it.

I think it was around 5 years ago when I first came across Vernor Vinge's concise but potent and provocative essay, The Coming Technological Singularity, in which Vinge outlines what he sees as an imminent future of super-human intelligence, at which point, he claims, "the human era will have ended." The time which Vinge expects this to happen by is 2030.

For those who don't know, Vernor Vinge is a sci-fi author, computer scientist and now-retired math professor. He's written a handful of Hugo Award-winning novels and novellas, including Fire Upon The Deep, A Deepness In The Sky, Rainbows End, and Fast Times at Fairmont High. His article on the singularity was published in 1993 in conjunction with a NASA-sponsored event called VISION-21 Symposium.

Basically, this short essay is something that I haven't been able to forget. It's like an impassive, left-justified afteraffect, or a whirling spiral funneling into oblivion that appears whenever I begin to think about 'human progress' and notions of morality.

For example, what prerequisite is there for environmental alarmism if machines are to be the next expression of evolution? ¹

And for theists—what significance do popular conceptions of 'God' have in a universe where consciousness can be uploaded and preserved? ²

What will become of human selfhood, that perceived uniqueness which leads to ideas like 'soul'—as all forms of intelligence become omni-accessible—and by entities with a far greater capacity to create cogent understanding than ourselves?

Does this not turn Jesus of Nazareth and his all-too-human brand of prophecy on its nappy head?

I feel confident that a dizzying and accelerating stage of technological advancement is underway, and while there are always Ludites—history tends to preserve them as such.

Vinge concludes his essay thusly:

I think the new era is simply too different to fit into the classical frame of good and evil. That frame is based on the idea of isolated, immutable minds connected by tenuous, low-bandwith links.

He then goes on to quote the Amercian physicist, Freeman Dyson:

"God is what mind becomes when it has passed beyond the scale of our comprehension."

Time recently did a feature on The Singularity, check it out: 2045: The Year Man Becomes Immortal

¹ I think the word 'machine' is provincial here. What we're really talking about is forms of AI that could foreseeably comprise processes which are quite biological.

² And perhaps re-implanted in our bodies which might be healed or reconstructed through biological engineering

GOD, LLC's 100th Post!!!

2011-02-07T20:18:00.000-08:00

Jesus lullaby from Matthew Henderson on Vimeo.

Crystal Cathedral files for bankruptcy

2011-01-26T12:08:00.000-08:00

Two things I love in this post: architecture and mega-churches going under.

Crystal Cathedral, its glimmering 'prayer spire,' and the handy "International Center for Possibility Thinking" (whatever the fuck that means) constitute an almost-buffet of modern-master church architecture. With a collaborative work between Philip Johnson and Richard Neutra, and a later addition by Richard Meier, it's the sort of trove that an enterprising pastor might like to polish regularly with a soft, lint-free cloth, getting the in-between parts with a Q-tip and mild cleanser.

But the mega-church ministry behind the nice architecture has filed for bankruptcy, citing unrest among creditors and a 30% drop in revenue, largely a result of the weakening donation stream from the church's televangelist show "Hour of Power."

Reports of the news when it first broke in October depict a convoluted scene:

Huffington Post

Wall Street Journal

NPR

The Game of Merit

2011-01-16T23:39:00.000-08:00

Believe it or not, my grandfather invented this game. It's called Merit, "The Catholic Game," and it comes with "Ecclesiastical Approbation" and bearing the inscription:

"Unless you turn and become as little children you shall not enter the Kingdom of Heaven."

(That is, of course, Matthew: 18: verse 1-6, for those who don't know.*)

The game is meant to be a fun educational tool for kids and adults alike to learn the rules and commandments of Catholicism. I found it to actually be somewhat demanding. For example, what is it to land on "Extreme Unction"? No, don't get out your 'wonder killer,' aka iPhone, that's cheating.

(Extreme Unction, as the accompanying graphic seems to indicate, has to do with some sort of a deathbed blessing, or perhaps confession. Basically, it's something Christopher Hitchens will likely opt out of.)

In general, this board game (and my Grandpa Ed) gets two thumbs up for presentation and execution. It's a very refined product. Very much in line with other more established board games. It seems to be based on Monopoly, except instead of houses you plant churches, and instead of a shoe, you are Mary.

As for playability, it is difficult for people like myself who lack a Catholic education to play this game. It is very much an educational game, and perhaps not the best drinking/party game.

Questions range in difficulty from "Who made you?" (Answer = "God made you." Silly!) to ones more exacting and obscure, like:

Q: Name the sorrowful mysteries of the rosary?

A: Agony in the Garden, Scourging at the Pillar, Crowning of Thorns, Carrying of the Cross, Crucifixion and death of our Lord."

You may draw a card which says:

"SAY ALOUD ONE HAIL MARY THEN MOVE TO ANY LOCATION ON THE BOARD DESIRED."

or this one, which caused surprise/laughter/confusion (in that order):

"SAY ALOUD AN EJACULATION, THEN MOVE TO ANY LOCATION ON THE BOARD DESIRED."

(Next thing I know I'm googling "examples of ejaculations," this could only be bad...)

Basically, this game is kind of fun. I take it back, it is a good drinking game. Or a good 'educational tool' depending on your idea of an education. I suspect there aren't too many of these floating around out there with board/game pieces/cards intact, but if you happen to see Merit "The Catholic Game" in the Goodwill bins, say aloud one Hail Mary and snatch it up cos my Grandpa designed that game!

I've added some pictures at Flickr.

The Alpha of Wikipedia

2011-01-15T13:53:00.000-08:00

It's only too appropriate that one of the first and most controversial articles created in Wikipedia's infancy was that of Jesus Christ. Slate gives an interesting overview, as Wikipedia turns 10:

http://www.slate.com/id/2281294/

Good press for God

2011-01-10T15:45:00.000-08:00

America loves a good rags-to-riches story. And God loves America.

I hope things continue to work out for this kind-hearted fellow...

Xhurch Update: Winter survival and beyond (and before).

2011-01-06T14:26:00.000-08:00

So it's a dramatic title and it isn't. Xhurch life is hard in a sense. I've had to forfeit a handful of domestic luxuries; shower, washer/dryer, dishwasher, and in the early days, heat and kitchen sink. I'm happy to say I've been enjoying the latter two amenities for some time now—life without would have truly been shit.

One of my two electric ranges broke back in November so I've been running on a single cylinder in the kitchen (Comfort Zone CZ-SS95 burner). Of course there's always the Chefmate Toaster Oven and Broiler which continues to impress me with its reliability and efficiency. Quorn Chick'n Nuggets for example can be prepared in a quarter the time it takes to bring a conventional oven to temperature, and with no compromise in taste or texture!

The oven's interior dimensions are of course nothing to boast about.

***

Outside of the kitchen, which sees a lot of the same meals prepared over-and-over, I'm continually impressed by the versatility of the xhurch's interior topography. The pews, heavy as they are, have found themselves in a host of different positions, coinciding with the different events that have been held here.

Quiet concerts, and talks—notably, the xhurch's lecture series—have been highlights of the xhurch's brief but nurturing trajectory.

A loud-and-proud Halloween concert was—well for one super rad—but also an important, if ill-advised episode for the xhurch, as it spurred instantaneous feedback from the neighbors and local law enforcement. This forced pressing matters of diplomacy in the ensuing weeks, and I'm glad to be in a position now to say the xhurch's neighbors are an insightful bunch, with great vision for the neighborhood, and a mind open to possibility.

***

Perhaps the crowning achievement of the Xhurch's 5 months of (hyper) activity was the nativity, which has been reported on in previous posts, and at other blog(s). This will surely evolve into a sort of holiday tradition, if the Xhurch-and-I can continue to make our marriage work.

Here's to luck and chance and everything nice in the new year!

XHURCH NATIVITY

2010-12-28T14:49:00.000-08:00

Photo: Eva Schifter

I posted some photos of the Xhurch's Christmas Nativity at Flickr.

(You may also view it as a slideshow with musical accompaniment here.)

The Xhurch's Christmas Nativity took place Thursday, December 23rd, between the hours of 5 and 8pm at the Xhurch. (The Xhurch, for those who don't know, is a small repurposed church in Portland, OR that has been remade into a home studio/gallery/event space. It is also home to GOD, LLC.)

The Xhurch's Christmas Nativity was a purely nostalgic nativity—a "non-theist's" nativity. It was an opportunity for a small contingent of irreligious types to create the conditions for a warm holiday scene, complete with mood lighting, low-volume Christmas music, homemade hot chocolate, homemade hot apple cider, and pews to sit and sip and reflect on the nativity.

A statement was issued to accompany the nativity which can be read here.

Special thanks to everyone involved in making the nativity a success, and to a delightful audience.

Holy See, seen and re-seen...

2010-12-26T12:36:00.000-08:00

Xhurch Nativity

2010-12-19T12:01:00.000-08:00

Duh! It was in the cards all along—the xhurch was to host a quality nativity this holiday season! And so, myself and a select group of godless cohorts have been busy constructing animals and costumes and mangers for the affair, which will take place on Thursday, December 23^rd, between the hours of 5 and 7pm.

The Xhurch's Christmas Nativity also marks my first concerted venture into the visual arts realm in years. Please come and enjoy the tranquil scene, have a cup of hot chocolate, and give yourself over to nostalgia's warm embrace. Or be made breathless by the terrestrial embodiment of your literal reading.

Read the Nativity Statement

R2D2 Christmas Tree

2010-12-14T18:45:00.000-08:00

A friend posted this on Facebook. Needless to say, I thought it was worth sharing. I suppose then I should have "liked" it...

It did get me thinking though—anyone have any interesting Christmas tree photos they'd like to submit? Any C-Tree-POs? Even plain-old Christmas trees can be interesting. Don't feel like you have to floor me. You couldn't possibly. Trust me I've seen EVERYTHING.

Submit to: submit@xhurch.net

Bill Moyers on the origins of the religious 'impulse,' according to Joseph Campbell

2010-12-12T12:14:00.000-08:00

I borrowed a great book from a friend: The Power of Myth. In it, decorated journalist, Bill Moyers, supplies the manuscripts from his interviews with Joseph Campbell in the years just before Campbell's death in 1987. The stuff of these interviews became the popular PBS documentary series, Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth.

Campbell had a way of stringing stories together that was basically mesmerizing. He had a sort of benevolent, paternal authority about him—a grandfatherly command over conversation. In a way, he seems to embody a bygone masculinity. This passage isn't meant to illustrate any of that, but it does provide an interesting account of what is sometimes called the "religious instinct."

Bill Moyers recalls Joseph Campbell's view:

He imagined that this grand and cacophonous chorus began when our primal ancestors told stories to themselves about the animals that they killed for food and about the supernatural world to which the animals seemed to go when they died. "Out there somewhere," beyond the visible plain of existence, was the "animal master," who held over human beings the power of life and death: if he failed to send the beasts back to be sacrificed again, the hunters and their kin would starve. Thus early societies learned that "the essence of life is that it lives by killing and eating; that's the great mystery that the myths have to deal with." The hunt became a ritual of sacrifice, and the hunters in turn performed acts of atonement to the departed spirits of the animals, hoping to coax them into returning to be sacrificed again. The beasts were seen as envoys from that other world, and Campbell surmised "a magical, wonderful accord" growing between the hunter and the hunted, as if they were locked in a "mystical, timeless" cycle of death, burial, and resurrection. Their art—the paintings on cave walls—and oral literature gave form to the impulse we now call religion.

'Benevolent domination:' Rorty on dealing with fundamentalist students

2010-12-09T13:11:00.000-08:00

This is straight from the Wiki-page on Rorty which I was exploring last night...

With respect to confronting religious fundamentalism in a university setting, Rorty says:

“It seems to me that the regulative idea that we heirs of the Enlightenment, we Socratists, most frequently use to criticize the conduct of various conversational partners is that of ‘needing education in order to outgrow their primitive fear, hatreds, and superstitions’ ... It is a concept which I, like most Americans who teach humanities or social science in colleges and universities, invoke when we try to arrange things so that students who enter as bigoted, homophobic, religious fundamentalists will leave college with views more like our own ... The fundamentalist parents of our fundamentalist students think that the entire ‘American liberal establishment’ is engaged in a conspiracy. The parents have a point. Their point is that we liberal teachers no more feel in a symmetrical communication situation when we talk with bigots than do kindergarten teachers talking with their students ... When we American college teachers encounter religious fundamentalists, we do not consider the possibility of reformulating our own practices of justification so as to give more weight to the authority of the Christian scriptures. Instead, we do our best to convince these students of the benefits of secularization. We assign first-person accounts of growing up homosexual to our homophobic students for the same reasons that German schoolteachers in the postwar period assigned The Diary of Anne Frank... You have to be educated in order to be ... a participant in our conversation ... So we are going to go right on trying to discredit you in the eyes of your children, trying to strip your fundamentalist religious community of dignity, trying to make your views seem silly rather than discussable. We are not so inclusivist as to tolerate intolerance such as yours ... I don’t see anything herrschaftsfrei [domination free] about my handling of my fundamentalist students. Rather, I think those students are lucky to find themselves under the benevolent Herrschaft [domination] of people like me, and to have escaped the grip of their frightening, vicious, dangerous parents ... I am just as provincial and contextualist as the Nazi teachers who made their students read Der Stürmer; the only difference is that I serve a better cause.”

– ‘Universality and Truth,’ in Robert B. Brandom (ed.), Rorty and his Critics (Oxford: Blackwell, 2000), pp. 21-2.

Prophetic indeed...

2010-12-08T14:46:00.000-08:00

What Maxwell fails to acknowledge are the ambitions of his own enterprise. The faithful yearn to see their doctrines gain ultimate acceptance, ever striving toward theocracy. Ridicule and marginalization are societies tools for regulating irrational, and/or unpopular beliefs.

Portland churches: Sandy (II)

2010-11-30T11:28:00.000-08:00

more at Flickr.

Portland churches: Sandy (I)

2010-11-30T11:03:00.000-08:00

more at Flickr.

Sam Harris in well-measured words

2010-11-28T12:08:00.000-08:00

November update: God LLC's faith intact

2010-11-26T20:59:00.000-08:00

Another Thanksgiving has passed, providing another opportunity to converse with relatives on the topic of faith and spirituality—a sort of faith-o-metric probing I due each year, with no such plans or intentions.

But alas, coming from a big family such as mine means being one among a plurality of beliefs and opinions and making an effort to understand one another. I feel fortunate to be a twig on such a diverse family tree, especially one that gets along so famously, and teaches me so much. I'm reminded often of my minority status as an atheist.

Still, the topic of spirituality continues to occupy me, in fact it enacts the most high-functioning part of my brain, that tier reserved for an uncharacteristic seriousness, or what might get called "discourse."

What is that special thing that happens when large groups of people get together with a unified purpose? That sense of oneness?

What is that feeling of elation you get when a scenic vista is reached amidst a day-long hike?

What happens in the brains of Pentecostal churchgoers during a cathartic outpouring of song and dance?

What I've realized is that I have my own way of describing these experiences. And it's important to recognize that I do so by way of a mix-and-mash of inherited vocabularies (things I've read/been taught, conversations I've had, life experiences that have shaped me). This is true for everyone; we are shaped and limited by our use of language, and I'm lately coming to terms with the rarity of my current vocabulary, that what I take for granted as prevalent, or common wisdom in describing 'spiritual' matters, is in fact newfangled, an emerging but underutilized dialect.

Evolving alongside this dialect is a new one for the faithful as well. A morphing set of ever-nebulous descriptions that shun the specific in favor of unity and tolerance. A Shack-esque permutation. In one sense, this is a good thing, as it means less blatant unthinking, less partitioning off of the mind to allow a refuge for pure unreason—but I wonder if the religious will wake one day soon and realize that really there is nothing concrete left to stand on; that what they really wish to hold onto, aside from the promise of a neatly grounded morality, is this notion of the 'spiritual,' and the comforts of ceremony. Both are notions which, I feel, can be redescribed; in psychological terms; in scientific terms; and through poetry.

As for the alleged supernature professed by most of the world's religions, with their stories of miraculous interventions and divine oversight, I continue to see these matters through a pane so pure, so clear—as clear and as pure as the most crystalline holy water, distilled from the tears of all of heaven's most chaste angels—that these accounts are merely hearsay, the memetic flotsam of our more primitive, fearful and ignorant ancestors, and it troubles me, when others can't see what appears so obvious; that the Jesus story, and all those of the world's religions are purely terrestrial, not divinely inspired, entirely without supernature—at least none that we can sensibly comment on.

Absurd seeming church names

2010-11-22T23:10:00.000-08:00

Ever notice how some church names are downright unintelligible? Or read less like a welcoming handle, and more like a jumbled-together string of keywords from a website's meta tag?

Take these for example:

Assemblies Of God Faith Christian Fellowship
Sound Doctrine Missionary Temple of Praise
Apostolic Assembly Of The Faith In Christ Jesus
Christian Science Eighth Church Of Christ Scientist
Greater Solid Rock Church Of God In Christ
Mt. Zion Fire Baptized Holiness Church of God of the Americas
Praise All Day Church of the Redeemer Christ Our Everlasting King

It's almost as if there's a master list of select church jargon that gets assigned to some lottery balls, and the first four or five to pop up indicate the name of a new sect:

Come on in, the fire's warm!
Photo: Jason Rinka

Here are some others that are funny for one reason or another:

Ark Of Safety Church Of God In Christ
Holiness Or Hell Church Of God In Christ
Boring United Methodist Church (Boring, MD)
The Entire Bible Church
C.R.A.C.K. House Ministries (Christ Resurrects After Crack Kills)

Petty Friday: The Jesus Coin Holy Medallion Of Life

2010-11-19T01:48:00.000-08:00

Courtesy of the Miami-based, The National Center For Religious Collectibles, you too can own this "special keepsake of His Eternal Love."

That's right, "in these uncertain times, don't be without this most important symbol of hope."

And if you're having second thoughts, remember, "True collectors recognize the majesty of this hand sculpted, master-crafted collectible."

HE WHO BELIEVES HAS ETERNAL LIFE!

Xhurch update: Part II

2010-11-18T15:36:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention. I found out some interesting history on the church. A neighbor tipped me off that there was an historic photo of the church at the Oregon History Museum. So I visited the OHS website to see if I could access it online but struck out, so I called their office and they referred me to the research library, to whom I sent an email soliciting historical materials. They got back rather promptly with two photos and a newspaper clipping(!)—all dating to-or-before 1952.

The newspaper clipping, stamped October 9th, 1952, told of a neighborhood controversy that was spurred when the church—then a synagogue—was in the process of being sold to, as the article states: "a negro congregation." Nothing like old periodicals to prove the impermanent nature of language.

Having the names of the two congregations involved in the sale, I was then able to poke Google's brain for more info, and Google responded faithfully, like a giant sea anemone that first turned inward—all its tentacles aflutter, and then spat back a name—that of a man called Samuel Gruber, who has a blog: Samuel Gruber's Jewish Art & Monuments.

His September 10th, 2010 entry pretty much tells it all.

The Xhurch, circa 1950. Photographer: unknown

Xhurch update

2010-11-16T22:15:00.001-08:00

As you may have read, October was a chilly month here. The heat has since been turned on however, and now I eagerly await my first bill so that I can know the cost of the relative luxury I've been enjoying within the newly warmed church walls. Seriously, I have high hopes for this bill. I feel that most of the obvious places where heat was bound to escape have been plugged up.

In the meantime, I've gotten use to cooking on two small camping-style burners and with a toaster oven (a highly efficient way to cook for up to two people). Also, my sleeping situation has changed somewhat, at least for the time being. Previously, I had unwittingly recreated the sleeping conditions of my infant-hood, when I shoved two pews together to create a cradle-like bed—the 'manger' as I liked to call it. Lined with wadded-up newspaper to level out the sleeping surface and then layered with two sheets of egg-crate foam, this was a surprisingly comfortable arrangement. Now I'm on a small mattress on the floor. Neither are as comfortable as my old queen-size bed, but I'm avoiding my former mattress in favor of stowaway-ability. It's important I'm able to make my bed disappear with no fuss to free up space for other of the church's functions.

At large, the xhurch feels more and more like home. I've become accustomed to a radically different color palette. The light and objects found here are strikingly distinct from anyplace I've ever lived. This is owed largely to the deep red carpets and blue-green stained glass windows, which mediate every bit of light that enters the building. I've found that it's best if I start the day by getting outdoors (even if just for a walk around the block) so as to expose myself to true daylight, and avoid the feeling of being shut-in. Working from home, and generally eating here too, the tendency is to be indoors a lot. It takes surprising discipline sometimes, especially in wintertime, just to get out.

I guess the good news is, I like my cell. There are trade-offs of course—I've outlined a few. But the church is a most-nurturing workshop, endlessly flexible, warm and spacious—accommodating, but just moody enough to keep my interest. I think I'll stay awhile.

Richard Dawkins stands and talks with Wendy Wright

2010-11-10T11:41:00.000-08:00

Wow. Where to begin. I think what makes this interview remarkable (and I haven't even watched past Part 1/7) is the way it's staged. It reminds me of the unsteadied, hyper-realistic quality that modern sitcoms have—where the line between reality TV and the traditional sitcom is blurred to the point where now, not only are the cameras shaky—reminding us there are operators behind them—but it almost seems normal to have an actor turn and face the the viewer in furtive acknowledgment, or for a confessional aside.

The participants in this interview do not do this. In fact, their ability to ignore the camera is astounding. But, it's clear both players—especially the perma-pleasant, plastic faced, crazy-eyed Wendy Wright—are aware they are making a media appearance.

Meta critique aside, this interview—while being viewer crack like a sitcom—is a momentous example of the cultural divide between Faith and Reason. A distillation of the all-cliched debate between a hard-nosed, incredulous (and in this case, admirably accommodating) scientist, and a hard-line, provincial, painfully oblivious, psychologically walled-off, unable-to-see-past-her-own-nose, faith-head.

It's the sort of thing where if you encountered it at a cocktail party, you might roll your eyes and kindly steer your date toward more promising company. Or perhaps (depending on your temperament) you might just shrink and repel from the ungodly awkwardness.

Of course, there's always those doting spectators who linger quietly on the periphery. Easy enough to be one of those on the internet.

Okay back to the fireworks (Part 2/7).

Catholic Church sees decrease in nuns and monks, members of clergy

2010-11-09T16:39:00.001-08:00

As BBC reports, the Catholic Church has seen a dramatic decrease in the number of "members of the consecrated life"—basically, nuns and monks, but also priests and deacons. This, despite a reported overall increase in Church membership to over 1.1 billion.

Inherently skeptical of such attempts to quantify religiosity, I did some poking around online. If the National Council of Churches' Yearbook of American & Canadian Churches is any indicator, then it can be expected that such statistics (which are reported annually by participating churches to the NCC) are representative of the state of the Church two years prior to the year of a given report being published, as the 2010 numbers are representative of polling that occurred in 2008. Given this two year lag time, I would be interested to see the 2012 figures given the torrent of controversy that engulfed the Church earlier this year.

BBC correspondents also pointed out the increase in membership "failed to keep pace with the overall increase in world population."

Even still, if the Catholic Church continues to grow in the face of all the scandal that plagues it it will not be to my surprise, as the troubled third world is being evangelized evermore; a nettlesome side effect of the much needed help they are receiving.

Meow Kids

2010-11-08T10:48:00.000-08:00

Every once in a while you encounter something and you know right where to put it.

Petty Friday: The Truth About Mormon Undergarments

2010-11-05T13:17:00.000-07:00

Of all faiths, Mormonism is perhaps the most open to ridicule on account of its relative newness. Minted in 1830 by the self-proclaimed prophet, Joseph Smith Jr., the Book of Mormon (though penned in the 19th century) is written using 17th century english.

Fast-forward 180 years and we see the Mormon meme in action:

"Banned" Mormon Cartoon

2010-11-03T00:17:00.000-07:00

When's Momanism the movie coming out? This would be radical in 3D!

The Omen, Children Of The Corn, Suspiria, and other ungodly horror films

2010-10-28T13:07:00.000-07:00

It's freaky movie month here at the xhurch, and having always fancied myself a horror buff, I realized recently (while browsing an "all time best" list) that there are countless titles—many classics even—that I've never really seen.

A handful, as it turns out, I only think I've seen—an effect of having walked the Hollywood Video horror aisle umpteen times in my pre-teen years.

Fast-forward to the present and a trip to the back room at Movie Madness is all it takes to realize the oceanic depths of the genre.

But The Omen, how had I never seen The Omen.

The less you know going in the better, I say:

The Omen
Children Of The Corn
Suspiria
Pet Sematary
Jaws
The Exorcist
Rosemary's Baby
The Shining
The Thing
Let The Right One In
Phantasm

This list is no doubt a fragment.

Suspiria is a movie to see.

Energy $avings + Cold Xhurches

2010-10-15T11:30:00.001-07:00

I'm thinking about energy savings and efficiency a lot lately. The xhurch is getting cold. But I'm just talking like 55 degrees-cold and it already feels coooold. I'm trying to imagine 40's or god-forbid, 30-anything. So I'm looking at heating it, but I gotta find a way to do it affordably. Weather-stripping and frugal usage I think will be the key. At a minimum, I'll have to heat the place enough to keep the pipes from freezing, but I also have to work, and you can't type very well in Bugaboos.

I guess the point is, that I'd kinda planned on roughing it this winter. Wearing a parka and sleeping with a scarf tied around my head, where dreams of sweet Spring would surely be dancing. Well, it's October, and while I haven't said uncle just yet, I can anticipate saying it real soon. So I called NW Natural, and they gave me a good tip. Ceiling fans. Do I have them? they asked. Why, yes. Yes I do. This will help keep the warm air from simply rising and collecting in the 3,200 cubic feet of vaulted ceiling space, 9 feet above where it's of any use to me. And so, while turning on the fans seems like a counter-intuitive thing to do in the winter time, this just may help keep me a little warmer on a budget.

Park51: Just Another Community Center, or Sly Theocratic Implement 'Victory Mosque'—You Decide!

2010-10-11T16:11:00.001-07:00

The whole "Ground Zero Mosque" controversy has been sensationalized. I've thought to cover it here, but why stoke the fire. Plus, if I allowed every public interest story with a religious motif to obligate me, I'd be committing myself to a life of solitude and digital abandon.

That said, the recently released artist's renderings for the proposed Park51 community center (formerly, Cordoba House) have spurred my interest. What they depict is a strikingly contemporary design, featuring an irregularly-patterned, honeycomb-like facade (reportedly based on abstractions from traditional arabesque patterns), and a crystalline interior that, as the above linked AP article put it, "could be an annex to Superman's Fortress of Solitude."

But aside from the somewhat adventurous look of the proposed community center/prayer facility, I'm interested mostly by what the look has to say about the mood of the building's proprietors. Clearly its meant to signal a break from the past. But in what direction does it point? And to what extent is its modernized aesthetic merely an appeal to secular society? Essentially, how much can the immutable doctrine of Islam really be expected to change?

Here's the best of three articles I read:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/oct/03/park51-building-ground-zero-mosque

Portland churches (Killingsworth)

2010-10-08T16:48:00.000-07:00

more at Flickr.

U.S. Religious Knowledge Survey

2010-09-30T16:40:00.000-07:00

Some interesting findings at the Pew Research Center's Forum on Religion & Public Life.

What a fantastic resource. What an immaculate website. If I weren't so un-enthralled by data sets, I would spend all day here. This is data design at its best. Crisp. Clear. Impeccably organized. Behold the elegance of the drop-down charts found here.

I'm made to think of Edward Tufte, who has some fine books on this stuff. I'm sure he'd approve.

False profits

2010-09-29T13:41:00.000-07:00

So yesterday took a turn for the fortuitous. First, I encountered this Slate article by Hitchens, which got me thinking about the "sort of free pass" that secular white America gives to black religious contingents.

Hitchens says:

"Many other charlatans have benefited from the clerical racket, and the most notorious of them—Jerry Falwell, Ted Haggard, Jim Bakker, Jimmy Swaggart—have been white. But there is something especially horrible about the way in which the black pulpit gets a sort of free pass, almost as if white society has assured itself that black Americans just love them some preaching. In this fog of ethnic condescension, it is much easier for mountebanks and demagogues to get away with it."

(A well elucidated point, I'd say. Something I've thought about but never put a finger on.)

That same evening I caught up with my friend Simon who happens to be reading God Is Not Great (and enjoying it, it sounds). In the book, Hitchens references a documentary: Marjoe. Simon watched it, said I might like it. He was right.

This film is somewhat mesmerizing. The title's namesake, Marjoe (a combination of the names Mary and Joseph), is a charismatic preacher, but a completely disingenuous one. Raised by professional evangelists who had him trained to spew the gospel at the ripe age of three (seriously, the results make Joe Jackson seem like a slouch), Marjoe went on to rebel and leave his life of church-itude behind, mixing instead with the free-spirited milieu of The Sixties. After some time, and after 'normalizing' to some extent, Marjoe returns to his life of preaching—only this time with a film crew.

Together they precede to dupe church honchos and followers alike, raking in ill-won donations, and exposing the ungodly art of religious charlatanism. It's really something to behold.

In one of the film's most memorable scenes, Marjoe gives a rousing (albeit characteristically canned) sermon at a mostly black Pentecostal church where the energy is downright effervescent. It's this scene that caused me to think back on the Hitchens article.

There's something so pure and genuine seeming—not about the preachers at black Pentecostal churches (at least not the ones featured in Marjoe)—but about the overall energy put forth by the congregation, the band, the gospel choir, the little old ladies with their little old lady hats and their hands in the air. It seems to defy the prejudices I have for other, stuffier, more stifling models of religious assemble, where instead of joyful outbursts you get solemn pageantry.

Now, I'm not excited about people continuing to delude themselves in either of these time-honored fashions. But for my money—or rather, had I to choose a church to preserve for posterity—I'd choose the Pentecostal faith for its sheer vitality and evident catharsis. What can I say, it plays on my sympathy. Part of what I think Hitchens was getting at.

Church improvements continue

2010-09-20T19:16:00.000-07:00

Hey all. Sometimes I feel like a big jerk on this blog. Then other times I feel like so totally justified. These are growing pains people!

Anyways, onto the most recent improvements around the ol' church (for those who are curious).

Finally got that kitchen sink installed (actually, that got finished a couple weeks ago).

Just this past week however I managed to find a temporary home for six of the fourteen pews that have been congesting the nave (i.e., my living room) for the past month.

The eight remaining pews will at times be a burden, but will also come in handy in certain applications. A blessing and a curse, as I like to say.

I think I'd like to start another weblog to deal exclusively with the church project. A place where others can feel encouraged to share their stories of church rehab/reuse. I think it will be called xhurches. I think a coffee table book will eventually follow. Or a coffee table digital-data-display ebook download, or whatever it ends up being when I finally get around to it.

Consider this an open invite to share any knowledge of church adaptations. I think I'm aware of two others in town. Gonna follow up.

Go tell it on the Blogosphere! 9-out-of-10 Popes agree, Christianity marginalized!

2010-09-17T10:58:00.000-07:00

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-11347073

Hitchens on Mortality

2010-09-13T12:03:00.000-07:00

More Portland churches (Woodstock)

2010-09-11T16:11:00.000-07:00

Nothin up top but a bucket and a mop...

2010-09-07T10:40:00.000-07:00

Jaycob got himself well inside the hole in the ceiling of the pastor's office. No bucket or mop, or bird books, but there was a 5-gallon drum of cottonseed oil that looks antique-y. I asked the internet if it was, it didn't know.

Portland churches

2010-09-05T21:56:00.000-07:00

So I was driving out to deep Southeast last Monday and I noticed an abundance of churches, which got me wondering; how many churches are there in Portland? A google search for "portland churches" yielded this chicken pocked portrait:

Since then I've seen some other cool ones around. Maybe I'll begin to document them. Here's a few I captured that day with my iPhone:

Also, this is off topic but that same day I encountered this blatant reuse of the Hollywood Video lettering:

21st Century Minimalism

2010-08-31T21:50:00.000-07:00

Part of me feels like my new life at the church is the confluence of a system of streams and tributaries, all channeling the stuff of dog-eared pages and trickling past efforts into a wide river of dreams and unrealized potential. It's a bit overwhelming.

I'm continuously reminded of connections. Reading articles online, skating to the taco stand, washing dishes; all these activities have a way of reminding me of the multitudinous influences that have resulted in what, for me, amounts to a "value system." I use quotes because, though I've grown accustom to the analogy, a 'system' connotes a much higher degree of rigor than I'm capable of embodying.

Still, there are values that have and continue to shape my decisions and, in turn, my direction—some of them steadier than others. I like to think of these 'systems' as being comprised of singular units, or cells or something of that sort. Each full of an idea or an influence and connected the whole in an array of untold complexity. We often encounter these influences similar to how a cat encounters the edge of a table, that is, we brush up against them—often as a matter of contingency, to use a word of one of my favorite philosophers.

This is never more true than while surfing the web.

Recently I've encountered a number of articles outlining an emerging cultural trend—that of an emerging frugality, or 'minimalism'. The gist can be gleaned from the title of a recent BBC piece, "Cult of less: Living out of a hard drive."

The idea here is that, with technology fastly weaving a virtual alternative to the physical world, a new world of cleaner lines and fewer possessions is imminent. Fewer possessions also means less space required for living. It's a simple concept, something we've probably all thought about—something best exemplified by the virtual "office" analogy, complete with "folders," "files" and a "desktop." These are all physical objects that were once a requirement for "doing business."

(As I'm typing this, I'm wondering what industries aren't currently undergoing a revolution. Computers are changing everything. Read Virnor Vinge's, "The Coming Technological Singularity" for an unsettling perspective on this.)

Contributing to this new 'minimalism' are two other obvious factors—the economy and our environmental woes. Not only are we adapting to a sharp economic contraction, we are also undergoing a shift in consciousness regarding the environment. Sobering climate reports and population growth trends have strained the call for sustainability, and this has in turn further suppressed economic growth. So in effect, there is a triple convergence of influences (technology/environment/economy) all directing us to reassess what it means to survive and to thrive. Unfortunately, the waking world is slow to catch on.

Business (perhaps inherently conservative) is still stuck in the old model which demands wasteful and redundant commutes, back and forth, back and forth. Having worked a traditional office job (with a traditional commute) I understand the advantages of a synergistic work environment where face-to-face interactions and accountability are the imperative. But the time has come for business leaders to recognize the new landscape that technology allows and strike a balance between "synergy" and technology.*

This means boldly weeding out waste. If I had to summarize what it is to be a 21st Century Minimalist, or among the "Cult of Less"—and believe me I'm not trying to claim fellowship, my friends would laugh themselves out of their chairs! (I have a tendency to accumulate things... some call it "hoarding")—if I had to summarize, I would start by saying it is a faction fundamentally averse to waste. This is something I identify with readily. Somewhere along the way, I became hyper-aware of waste I create. It's become a bit of an obsession—now, it's to the point where I'd rather not create any, but this is of course wishful thinking, subject to endless interpretation and circumstance.

Nonetheless, it's an ideal that's part of what makes the church (God LLC's new home) such a grand upgrade. The church is a place that I believe affirms this notion of "less." It's the embodiment of a value system—an adapted space which devalues religious worship, champions reuse, and despises waste. A dust speck on a dense and vibrant local landscape, where daily amenities are accessible by foot or by bike. A place where work gets done on a computer (much entertainment derived there too), where a proper desk is overkill, a filing cabinet hardly necessary, a television/souped-up stereo/entertainment center shunned, along with CD racks, DVD racks, etc. A bookshelf may yet be serviceable, as I still fetishize books, but not phonebooks!

What is more (or less?), the absence of walls—those intimate envoys of space instruction that can at times feel like your fussy mother went and cleaned and organized your room for you while you were out—makes way for a lovingly open plan, whose airy expanse looks to the occupant for instruction.

For some time now I've wondered (for about as long as I've been certain that religious orthodoxy is on the wane), what will become of the world's churches? Not the world's famous churches, but the run-of-the-mill churches, the humdrum chapels bespeckling the countryside, the modest worship houses and mid-sized naves, too many to count, in our cities and towns.

According to the lispy Slovenian philosopher (and atheist), Slavoj Žižek, "Churches should be turned into grain silos or palaces of culture."

What I'd like to impart is that adaptive reuse, particularly that of churches, is an exciting prospect. At the intersection of sustainability and preservation, the new minimalism, and the old conservatism.

xhurch Improvement

2010-08-24T10:08:00.000-07:00

I apologize if this forum turns into a home improvement blog in the coming weeks, but my new environ requires a few renovations and upgrades. The most pressing of which, you might imagine to be a shower. But in fact it is a kitchen sink. There is little dignity in asking your friends "hey can I grab a shower on my visit?" but there is even littler dignity in meticulously scraping residual food into the garbage before washing your dishes in the bathroom sink.

Thankfully, I have a talented and motley pool of friends from whom to call upon for their many varied services and generosity. Today's task will require the expertise of Reggie, a skilled plumber and all-around rad dude.

In preparation for today's work I had to school myself in the ways of random orbit sanding. This is not rocket science, and in fact, I got a brief demo from Isaac (the friend that loaned me the sander, also a rad dude). This generosity and community-building is one of the imminent joys of a project like this, and still I'm surprised and grateful at the willingness of friends to contribute their time and resources.

Okay, it's easy to get sappy when there are sponsors to thank. This God, LLC Church Improvement update was brought to you in part by Porter-Cable Quicksand^® random orbital sander:

Repurposed Church

2010-08-16T00:02:00.000-07:00

God, LLC has recently relocated. The new digs: a humble but lovely church in NE Portland. I think it goes without saying that I am smug to inhabit such a once-holy venue—what with its pews and pulpit and stained glass windows. But as the veneer of sacredness quickly wears off, I'm struck by the brisk pace at which a space can be transformed from "holy" to ordinary.

Not that a live-in church is exactly ordinary.

In its olde role, as a proper church (that is to say, before I moved in) the building struggled to fulfill its intended function; the outside, unremarkable, nondescript, too small and outdated to impart credibility or attract prospective newcomers; the inside, similarly unimpressive, too tiny to accommodate anything more than a micro-congregation, at least by today's standards.

(In this respect [were I a little more like Oregon's own, Edmond Creffield], I'd image it a good place to start up a new faith—or a new 'radical' arm of some existing faith. Or a cult. Funny that we make these distinctions.)

But in its new role, as a new "church" (that is to say, since I've moved in), such a venue becomes a cavern of possibility. Its design is meant to invite, to accommodate, to direct attention forward and upward—but upward toward what? What shall we exalt here in this newly scrubbed cabin? this church without a name? this place now one-fewer for the spreading of simple, dogmatic memes?

These are the questions I am wrestling with of late. Pawing at more like. I have some ideas. Stay tuned.

Rootin' for you Hitch.

2010-08-04T12:05:00.000-07:00

Maybe I should just change the title of this blog to Hitch, LLC. At least for a few months. Hitch, LLC: Diagnosis and Progress...

Just read this article from Hitchens at Vanity Fair:

http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/features/2010/09/hitchens-201009

Christopher Hitchens has throat cancer

2010-07-01T12:09:00.000-07:00

The brazen and embattled atheist, Christopher Hitchens, author of God Is Not Great and a recent memior, has been diagnosed with cancer of the esophagus. The survival rate for such cancer is disheartening (the five-year relative survival rate is well under 50%, even for cases where the cancer is localized [see American Cancer Society report]).

Also in the above-linked report are recommendations for prevention, which read like an inverse to-do list of Hitchens' daily regimen. The heavy-set, enfant terrible is known for leading an indulgent lifestyle with plenty of drinking and smoking.

That said, his public stance against all forms of religious zealotry has been nothing short of heroic. God, LLC wishes him the best possible recovery.

Repent Christians. Repent Now.

2010-06-16T16:16:00.000-07:00

Six-story-tall "Touchdown" Jesus burns to the ground in Monroe, Ohio, after being struck by lightning. I've embedded the official press release above, but there's all sorts of junk floating around the web:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/world/us_and_canada/10321466.stm

The Shack: Didn't read it.

2010-06-04T12:05:00.000-07:00

Continuing on in my as-of-late curatorial role, I bring you more spotty coverage.

The Shack: Wanted to read and review it, but didn't. Keep seeing it at Freddie's and am aware that it has made quite the splash in believer circles and among those pining. But, alas, time sinks elsewhere.

And now, thanks to this splendid review, my desire to read it is abated!

Thanks, Slate:
http://www.slate.com/id/2255741/

I, Anonymous. You, Polygamist.

2010-05-09T13:23:00.000-07:00

An underpowered attempt at finding a tasty Mother's Day morsel, yielded this bittersweet Mother's Day message found at a Texas polygamy blog:

5/13/2007
Anonymous said...

I love you mom wherever you are! I believe that by my growing emotionally stronger and following my own conscience instead of following you know who I am honoring you even though you may not agree today. I forgive you for turning your back on me because I know how you are influenced by the people around you and there are some powerful personalities in your circle. If there is ever anything I can do to help, I hope you remember me. You know where I live.

---

Jesus Meal SUPER-SIZED!

2010-04-12T18:01:00.000-07:00

The Jesus meal keeps getting bigger!

This is last week's news and kind of a stupid story!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8580146.stm

HE IS RISEN!

2010-04-04T02:47:00.000-07:00

Solaris: A Green Lullaby

2010-04-02T01:03:00.000-07:00

Just revisited what has surely become one of my all-time favorite movies, Solaris (Tarkovsy, 1972). Reasons for loving this movie are myriad—among them are its calming and self-assured rhythms and transparent Philosophical themes. For contemplative types, even those who generally avoid sci-fi like yours truly, few movies are so satisfying.

Haiti: Reflections on catastrophe.

2010-03-29T22:50:00.000-07:00

[I wrote a draft of this in the early days following the Haiti quake and decided not to post it fearing its perceived insensitivity. I reread it recently and thought it contained some worthwhile thoughts so I'm posting it after having made some edits, etc.]

---

Sudden mass casualties have a unique way of sending the human community spiraling into a frenzied revaluation of all our worldy beliefs.

As believers in God, we're forced to confront the logical conniption of such large-scale suffering occurring under the supposedly benevolent and omnipresent gaze of an all-powerful creator. Those whose God is of the retributive persuasion, may incline towards identifying reasons why one community and not another may have deserved such a devastating expression of wrath. Those without a belief in God—particularly when enduring suffering—may find themselves feeling (more than ever) the absence of such a powerful healing agent, looking for something, anything to pin their hopes to. People in all categories are likely to experience a heightened sense of cause, as it is all too human to ask, Why?

Our very membership to the human family connotes an obsession with causes. We've built our science around them, our very lives and ascension as a species seems to have everything to do with our ability to recognize and route out causes. Anything we might define as "progress" depends on the discovery of new causes, or on back-linking old causes to still older causes which are then, in turn, effects as well as causes; the result (to our mind's eye) is a chain of events receding back in time and disappearing into the abyss of pre-history.

It's with this long chain of history in mind (and with the utmost caution and sensitivity) that I contemplate the significance of an event such as this most recent natural disaster in Haiti [and also the still more recent Chilean earthquake].

Here's a question: How is the ordinary suffering that we as a species experience everyday any different from the calamitous suffering caused by a natural disaster?

Granted, one is a far less concentrated form of suffering. But is there something fundamentally different about it? Some lesser significance? If one thinks about the innumerable ways in which humans suffer every day—in hospitals, in poverty and starvation, in illness, in accidents and sudden tragedy, at the hands of one another—and then considers the fact that death (likely accompanied by some degree of suffering) is something, the fate of which, no single human being has ever escaped; why then should space/time-based notions like concentration or frequency or proximity imbue an event with any added significance? Is life not intrinsically hostile?

Imagine for a moment, each of every life regretfully cut short by the Haiti quake tenderly spread out over time, shuffled in among the mean, "ordinary" suffering we accept as normal—would that not dilute our sense of loss?

Proximity is everything.

The lives lost in Haiti and Chile bespeak an unfathomable sum of grief and anguish. This is felt by the human community at large, but is no doubt experienced most acutely by the family and friends of the victims. The severance of these vital human connections—alive through shared experience, love and kinship, but cut short without explanation or higher cause—offends our very humanness, rattles our concocted sense of justice, and results in immeasurable sorrow and frustration.

And yet, the further you get from an event of this sort, the more the forcefield of sensitivity wains. Given enough time, of course, nothing is sacred. One day you wake up and it's somehow acceptable to make jokes of a certain kind. Holocaust jokes (one would be hard-pressed to come up with a more oxymoronic two-word phrase) are, indeed, taboo. But that doesn't keep many variety from circulating. Such jokes have the potential to elicit a wide range of reactions; even in the most receptive of telling environments it would still likely be acknowledged as being "off-color." But off-color? Surely in the direct wake of 1945, any "taking lightly" of the events that had just transpired warranted a visceral, barbaric reaction.

Proximity is everything.

I don't intend on making any jokes. My only aim here is to give a broad-lensed perspective of our human predicament: mainly, that death and disorder and calamity are as much a part of life as their antonyms; and that history (what's known of it) is the record of these elements playing out, for better and for worse, and with impartiality.

For info on the relief efforts in Haiti and Chile, and for an easy way to donate visit: http://www.redcross.org/.

The higher intelligence behind Doritos packaging (a/k/a, God LLC's 50th Post!)

2010-03-12T02:22:00.001-08:00

Standing in the rain chatting with a fellow the other night about philosophy and all the fruits that the examined life can bring, we couldn't quite decide whether it was a road to liberation or tyranny, happiness or depression. We wanted to say liberation and happiness (nature favors optimism), but we lamented what we both agreed was an anti-climax with respect to philosophy's promise of greater clarity and enlightenment.

That night I went home and sat upright in bed and partook an odd ritual—I ate a bag of Spicy Sweet Chile Doritos just before turning out the light. As a side note, this made my tongue very raw the next morning and so I don't recommend doing this. But as I was finishing off the bag I was examining the packaging. Having some design expertise, I am often fascinated by the finer details of product packaging, particularly when those products are of as meager import as corn chips. This of course does not stop them from strutting as though they were the life-blood of a generation, able to adapt to the times like Modonna, pre-American Life.

Unfortunately though for snack food, such ambitions are quite out of reach. Beer is of a slightly more respectable pedigree and commands a proportionately greater amount of respect. This is of course evidenced by the more frequent use of crests, and shields, and ornate badges suggestive of awards—or in the case of Tecate, a reich-ish eagle ("Excuse me, do you have any Nazi-approved beer?").

Still, though snack food may occupy the near-lowest totem on the hierarchy of consumed goods, this does not stop Doritos from trying to offer me an "experience" beyond that of the "game-changing" "bold and daring" flavor of their sensational "flavored tortilla chips." Such transient, mere hunger-staving fulfillment is apparently limiting. And besides that's not what you payed 99¢ for, you wanted an "EXPERIENCE!"

And an experience you'll have—if you just visit snackstrongproductions.com! It's there that you'll realize Doritos is far more than a corn chip manufacturer. Doritos is a lifestyle, doy! And they've teamed up with E.A. Sports to bring you more great Doritos® brand experiences—which is exciting!

Here's a question, why should a corn chips website take over a minute to load because of some fancy Flash feature? And just how much do people who construct fancy corn chip websites get paid? I'm honestly curious about this second question (and if you have any leads on snack food design prospects, please find a way to get in touch with me, I'm on the internet).

My guess is, they get payed a lot. Like, a lot-a lot. And all so a corn chip manufacturer can stay "relevant." Of course, in effect I can think of few things less relevant than on-fire tortilla chips, bitted-out squiggles and the color purple—but hey, I'm not from Plano, TX, so what do I know.

Maybe by now you're wondering like I am, what this has to do with the supposed purpose of this blog. At times on this forum, this has meant that I'm about to address irony. But since it's hard to do this without sounding like a total gay-fag (pardon my southpark) I'll just note that at the end of the day, I've been more seduced by Philosophy's promise of a better life than Doritos' (I know, a bit naive of me of to say...). Maybe it's a mistake, perhaps both are equally invalid. But the difference, for me, has been sustenance vs. empty calories.

Petty Friday: U_i_n G_s_e_ M_s_i_n Thrift Store

2010-03-05T23:59:00.000-08:00

I've been wanting to make this confession for some time. But making it means I'll have to ID my favorite under-frequented thrift store—a best kept secret among myself and certain of my peers (most of whom now live out-of-state). I suppose it's not actually necessary that I disclose the store's name or location, but I will anyways—just don't go snatching up anything good that I might want, unless of course you're getting it for your's truly.

Our story begins (as many do) behind a dubious Teriyaki stand in Tigard—a concrete cutaway yields to a secret cove: the parking lot of the Union Gospel Mission Thrift Store.

I forget exactly who it was that turned me on to this hoarder's oasis—maybe it was Brittney, possibly Simon (it hardly matters at this point except that I might duly thank them). The fact remains, that the Union Gospel Mission Thrift Store is of that rare and coveted type that satisfies two essential criteria: one, it has "good stuff" (this is of course completely subjective) and two, it doesn't seem to have any sense for the real value of the goods on display—or at least, it shrugs-off the potential for greater profitability.

The result (for me) is a smorgasbord of stuff-I-don't-really-need-but-can-easily-justify-not-having-to-live-without-if-the-price-is-right. The concept is a mouthful but it can be easily summed in two words—"price absolution."

Price absolution makes for the very foundation of my hoarding... ahem... thrifting habits. It means that if the price is negligible (i.e., $2, 50¢, etc.), then any guilt that might otherwise be associated with a given purchase is absolved. In other words, if I can walk out of a thrift store with a new hat, some cassette tapes, a book on the joy of indoor plants and a kitchen drawer full of primary-colored plasticware—all for under $5!—then why should it matter if I don't get around to reading (or clipping the images out of) the book for 17 years? People blow that much nightly at the video poker machine.

Oh well, who cares. I'm not trying to rationalize anything. The point is, until it starts to tear my family apart one day, I'm perfectly comfortable with my tendency to accumulate things.

I am however less comfortable with purchasing these frivolties from Christian-run thrift stores. I don't know why, I guess I just feel... guilty (I know right, like who's gonna judge me.) Principles, it turns out, can just as easily give rise to feelings of guilt as can morals, and in the case of the atheist who shops at the Christian-run thrift store to take advantage of the "guilt-absolving" pricing, there is likely a violation of principles. But just which principles?

To some extent, the weight I've been carrying with respect to my many and various UGMTS purchases, has everything to do with the erroneous presumption that the sole purpose of United Gospel Mission Thrift Store is to service the less fortunate—to do things like furnish the homes of those who could not afford to "buy new," or to clothe those who, without the help of that new blueberry-colored power suit and off-matching pumps, might have entered into that job interview with confidence suboptimal.

Accordingly, who am I to step in and take advantage of these perceived hand outs (often merely to to satisfy my aesthetic whims), when clearly the items supplied are intended for those less fortunate than myself. Plus, these hand outs are being provided in accordance with a Christian ethic that says help the needy—am I not scum?

So goes my self-important logic.

As it turns out, according to the Union Gospel Mission website "revenue generated by the thrift store helps men and women in the LifeChange recovery community," the addiction recovery arm of UGM. This means that, in effect, I'm doing my part to support a rich tradition of indoctrination. Should this cancel out any of the guilty feelings outlined above? Okay, so now I am rationalizing.

Basically, all items on display are received by donation and then sold, and the profits largely go to benefit the recovery program. Also, most if not all of the store's workers are part of the program.

In the end, my core reason for thrifting (as you might imagine) is quite distinct from helping Union Gospel Mission. Why buy new when there is plenty of decent stuff out there to get use out of. Rather than acquire a taste for everything new, why not acquire an appreciation for all things old, and enrich your experience of history in the process. In conjunction with the ever-clued-in internet, there is much to be gleaned from perusing old manuals, fondling relic electronics, and examining ephemera—such things are informative.

I've prepared a small collage of sights and sound for your meditative enjoyment.

As Seen On TV: Prayer Cross

2010-02-24T23:23:00.000-08:00

"[Almost] Miraculously" reveals the entire Lord's Prayer! Perfect gift for Communions or Confirmations, Christmas or Easter, Anniversaries or Graduations! Experience the magic of the Payer Cross! ORDER NOW / HIDDEN PRAYER / ORDER NOW!!!

Here's a pretty funny spoof:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vq-SQLRbm00

Hitchens interviews for Portland (last)Monthly

2010-02-03T01:48:00.000-08:00

I'm a bit late on bringing this to you. Perhaps you've already noticed (like I did while standing in line at Freddie's) that Portland Monthly recently interviewed Christopher Hitchens. I meant to let you know sooner, just like I meant to let you know about Hitchen's appearance at Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall early last month. What can I say, I'll try and do better.

This isn't the nightly news, after all. That is, you won't catch me saying "Depend on me!" or "These are the stories that matter to you!" No, despite the confidence you may have instilled in me, reading this blog will not help keep your family safe (actually, that's debatable), or give you any guiding light to follow.

If you miss an entry—or even if you don't, apparently—the worst that will happen is you miss Christopher Hitchens when he comes to town—which, mind you, I view to be a stinging consequences of my neglect.

Christopher Hitchens is a name which I would like to begin to take for granted on this forum. That is, it no longer feels natural to supply him with any sort of introduction. Suffice it to say, he's the best public defender of atheism that I've observed, and has done much to combat the intractable and cumbersome meme of Religion in an age that, until recently (thanks to Hitchen's and other outspoken atheists), had become much too accommodating.

The interview—billed by Portland Monthly as "an encounter more befitting the Rose City: a conversation with a liberal believer..."—aimed to pair Hitchens not with yet another fundamentalist Christian (a format that I imagine becomes tiring), but instead with a retired minister from one of the more evolved tentacles of the Christian faith—the First Unitarian Church of Portland.

Too say that it's evolved is simply to say that it has followed the trend of becoming increasingly watered down. Interviewer and former church minister, Marilyn Sewell, while seeming like a cool enough lady—and clearly one who has pressed up against the boundaries of faiths constraints—in turn represents the vague and vaporous future of religion as it evolves into nothing in particular.

Listen to the full interview at PortlandMonthly.com

Prince writes fight song with epic evocations

2010-01-24T13:33:00.000-08:00

Prince symbol in ice cavern
By: jamesNpatti

God (if he's listening at all) knows I love Prince. And Prince, in all his serial-privacy and symbol-hood, yields as great a question mark as any of the venerable riddles I try and fail to solve on this blog. Perhaps I don't set out to solve, only to articulate the cause for dissolution.

One thing I've always admired about Prince is his broad-minded way of framing things. Sure he's written songs about small red Corvettes and raspberry colored headgear—both vivid images that the mind readily latches onto—but often these frivolties betray a greater depth of insight.

I don't want to qualify that, it's just a feeling I get.

On the other hand, Prince is at times less narrative and more explicit. Take one of my all-time favorite songs Controversy for example. In this 3mins and 30secs of ecstasy, a brief but impactful intro gives way to a light and bouncy verse, which then transitions miraculously into one of the most slyly-epic and dark choruses of all time. It's in these sweeping passages that Prince opens the veins of all humanity, crying "Do I believe in God? Do I believe in Peace? Some people wanna die so they can be free. Life is just a game, we're all just the same."

Dark as these lyrics might seem, the song maintains an amazingly light feel throughout, satisfying all criteria for danceability, and making Controversy a resounding testament to Prince's genius.

Still—though I am a fan and incline toward exaltation—I am not the sort of fan who wishes to support the objects of my interest in their every effort, indiscriminately. That is not to undercut Prince's most recent submission—which hilariously is a fight song for the Minnesota Vikings. I mean only to say—and I think it will be clear upon hearing it—that "Purple and Gold" (as it's called) is not representative of the entities best work. It's kind of meandering actually. And not that catchy. It is, however, wholly endearing and makes me want to cheer for the Vikings and ever-harder for Prince, whose many talents include not giving a shit.

Listen to Purple and Gold:

Purple and Gold Lyrics:

the veil of the sky draws open
the roar of the chariots touch down
we r the ones who have now come again
and walk upon water like solid ground
as we approach the throne we won't bow down
this time we won't b denied

raise every voice and let it b known
in the name of the purple and gold

we come in the name of the purple and gold
all of the odds r in r favor
no prediction 2 bold
we r the truth if the truth can b told
long reign the purple and gold

the eyes say ready 4 battle
no need 4 sword in hand
we r all amped up like a rock n roll band
ready 2 celebrate every score
ready 2 fight the elegant war
ready 2 hear the crowd roar

that's what we came 4
and so much more
in the name of the purple and gold

r spirits may b tired
r bodies may b worn
but since this day is r destiny
r history – that's y we must b
4ever strong as the wind that blows the Vikings' horn
in the name of the purple and gold

CHORUS

---

Read more from the source that broke the news:

http://www.myfoxtwincities.com/dpp/sports/prince-reveals-song-for-vikings-saints-game

Precious Facebook comment

2010-01-18T00:28:00.000-08:00

Terwilliger "Mystery" Mural Inquiry (Part Two: No mystery technology can't solve)

2010-01-15T22:50:00.000-08:00

Mural at St. Mark Presbyterian Church, Portland, OR
Photo: God, LLC

One discouraging aspect of this modern life is the complete lack of mystery. I don't mean those age old mysteries—why are we here? who made the world? who made the guy who made the world? why does stuff come wrapped in that inpenetrable hard plastic that cuts the consumer when he tries to open it with scissors? No, I'm referring instead to those little curiosities, those "mysteries" the solving of which, in a pre-google, pre-smartphone world, required a phone call, an appointment, an interview—a brush with fellow man wherein a lead was captured demanding that you shimmy down that rabbit's hole into the very den of secrets where your little mystery was kept. Or at least a trip to the library was in order.

But alas, the problem with the direction of technology is that we are soon to inhabit a world scrubbed of all mystery. A world where information flows like water—actually quite unlike water, or anything else for that matter. Sure to be evermore accessible, evermore complete, we will soon find ourselves merged with it—we will interface with it—control it with our eye movements, or quite possibly with our very minds.

We've all by now experienced the humble beginnings of this likely future—among friends, or around the dinner table perhaps. In the course of conversation you've run into a snag because you can't remember what it's called when you trim shrubs into nifty shapes for ornament, and all you can do is say, "You know, like Edward Scissorhands," but no one is quite on your page, so you have the thought to google it, and sure enough, the word you couldn't think of was "topiary."

Talk about outboard memory potential.

With these luddite views of mine in tow, I set out to discover the meaning of the St. Mark's Presbyterian Church mural—the old fashioned way, without the help of Google's search engine.

I embarked the first day on foot, wrapped in a scarf, with my Rite Aid Ray-Ban's and some fingerless gloves (I was otherwise presentable, as these were all accessories I could shed before I made my introduction). For all my romantic talk of the pursuit of mystery, my plan was dumbly simple: walk to the church and see if anyone there could answer my questions about the mural. I had a pocket-sized spiral notebook and a good pen.

Strike one came in the form of a daycare volunteer. She apparently was merely a volunteer at the daycare that resides below the church, and really knew nothing about the mural, despite its towering dominion just feet above her place of volenteerdom. I then was reminded that the church complex was home to two organizations, St. Mark's Presbyterian Church and P'nai Or of Portland, a Jewish community center. The daycare, I believe, is associated with P'nai Or, though I'm not sure of that.

Regardless, the gal at the daycare new nothing and suggested I talk with the people upstairs. Aha! My first lead.

This should have been helpful, but there were no other cars in the parking lot, and indeed, no other church personel to flag down. I headed back to my house, a touch deflated that "things hadn't just worked out." I nonetheless enjoyed the walk and the fresh air.

Strike two came two days later in the form of another dumb-headed wishful jaunt back to the church. This "detective work," you may have noticed, is part sleuthing, part exercise—and this is exactly what I'm talking about here! The chance to get out in the world and mix yourself with it. Smell the smells, and touch the plants. Notice the progress on the gutting and polishing of that salvaged Airstream trailer you've been coveting seven houses down. Maybe that's just me.

Regardless, the mission was only a success in the above outlined "tangential" sense. My spiral notebook remained un-jotted as the parking lot was, this time, completely empty.

At this point you might be, in your mind, criticizing my methods. Why didn't I just do the legwork to see when someone was gonna be around—look into the church's hours, you know? To my critics, I have no great answer. I'm a shitty detective, is that what you want to hear? Ok. I'm a shitty detective.

And I only proved shittier when on a third day—today in fact—I tried yet again, this time in a drive-by effort, before and after a trip to the bank. I'm starting to wonder when the fuck these people get together anyhow. I'll happily adopt one of their offices if they're not going to use it 3-out-of-5 days of the working week. Anyways, that's all the worked up I got.

Maybe you see where this is headed.

In my defense, I got sick twice this week—that put a slight damper on my motivation and potential to devise better plans. By the time I made today's last-ditch drive-by effort, I had already resigned myself to poking Google if things didn't work out again at the church. Sure enough, when they didn't, I came home and was reminded where my true detective skills lie—in my ability to sniff stuff out online. It wasn't perfectly straight forward, I'll have you know. It took me four or five search formulations and some elementary problem solving to make the discovery (one of the more exhilarating web searches of resent memory!).

First, I discovered the website of the church. Then the name of the mural—"The Vigil of St. Mark." Unfortunately, the link to "Vigil of St Mark Mural" page was broken (I emailed them to fix), so I googled "Vigil of St. Mark Mural" and came up with the artist's name—ESTEBAN CAMACHO STEFFENSEN (I found this neat video of him instructing high school kids in the art of mural-making). At this point, I was close. I found a couple articles that made mention of the mural, but nothing engaging it directly, giving me the full-body analysis I was hoping for. Here and there, I was learning things, for example Esteban is from (or maybe just hails from) Costa Rica. He attended Pacific Northwest College of Art and describes the mural painting process as a sort of performance, where the artist's engagement with onlookers is a vital part of the process.

Anyhow, here's the moment you've maybe been waiting for. I'll go ahead and just link you to the source. It's the announcement of the dedication of the mural, as it appeared in Omnibus, a Presbyterian newsletter, penned by St. Mark's very own pastor, The Rev. Dr. Barbara J. Campbell (If only the good Reverend Doctor knew of my envelope-pushing impracticality in pursuit of her expertise...)

I think the final search phrase ended up being "Esteban Steffensen Camacho, Vigil of St. Mark". In fact, I know it was.

Here's the goods. You'll need to navigate to page 11 for the story.

Hooaah! Pre-battle ritual makes me wanna barf...

2010-01-11T19:03:00.000-08:00

I'd embed the video here but I wouldn't want to tempt the BBC to come break my knees, so you'll have to visit the link if you're interested:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/newsnight/markurban/2010/01/the_dangers_of.html

The link is to a good article on what motivates a war journalist, but sandwiched in between the story text you'll find a video that gives an in-depth look into a recent US marines operation in Now Zad, a small ghost-village in Helmand Province. Don't worry there's no graphic violence, but I will give it a PG-13 rating for strong language (adjusted for inflation of course).

Inflation, as it were—more specifically inflation of language—happens to be a chief theme of this post. In the video, at about 4.22, Captian Michael Taylor (acting war chaplain) blesses the impending mission with a battle-prayer that drips with toxic dogma, and showcases the mind-bending malleability of faith-speak.

Now, to be fair (ugh! there's always a "to be fair." and a plurality of ways in which "to be fair"). None the less, to be fair it makes sense to acknowledge the malleability of language in general. That is, all things, not just faith, can be appropriated, mis-used, mis-represented, misunderstood, skewed and so forth.

But why are the faithful reminding God of anything? They credit him with being all-powerful, all-mighty, all-knowing, all-seeing, all-benevolent. Why then should he be reminded? And why then are good Christians allowed to fall at the hands of "a merciless [evil] enemy?" These are the questions that would keep a logician up at night, if he didn't have more practical things to think about.

The point (maybe) is that language continues to be the ladle stirring the contents of faith's crock-pot into an ever soupier amalgam, so that now you stare into it and you think—what the fuck's for dinner?

Not that I'm dinning at that table. It's just I've taken a special interest in these contradictions.

Moving on, however, to army culture at large (or, at least as depicted in this documentary footage)—what a horrific display. Get hyped to go blow some people away, sounds great. I see that there are clearly survival mechanics at work, but Jesus H. Christ, these are the types of individuals who get all puffed-up and unruly on the sidewalk outside of nightclubs and cause me to smack my head and ask "is there any decency?" I mean, I know we're at war and people gotta get killed or be killed, but could we at least do it with a some class? The answer, apparently, is no. Or the reality is no.

Another way to look at it is, these poor kids are out there doing battle so that I can sit here and spout off about it. At least that's what we're told. We're told by our government, by everyone it seems, to support our troops. Contradictorily, in no other arena is this sort of behavior esteemed. It's pretty clear that these personality types—some pre-existing, many born of war—are merely instrumental in our current global predicament.

Regardless, I can't support what I've just witnessed, it makes me want to hurl. My support can easily extend to those friends that have enmeshed themselves with war. But the machine that drives it makes me want to get sick. So do the forces of "God's Army," (no, the other God's army), twice over.

So there's a predicament.

"Brothers"
Courtesy of Hoofing It

Terwilliger "Mystery" Mural Inquiry (Part One: A strange allure)

2010-01-10T16:51:00.000-08:00

St. Mark Presbyterian Church, Portland, OR
Photo: God, LLC

I've walked and driven-by this mural countless times and it hasn't ceased to puzzle me. It has a strange allure. Not only is it quite well done for what should, by all indications, be an entirely ordinary, vanilla church/daycare mural (poorly-rendered children of all races doing cartwheels comes to mind), but its vivid colors, sharp lines and triumphant winged white lion evoke a certain mysticism, and it's prompted a curiosity in me that has resulted in my first God, LLC "assignment" (self-appointed, of course).

My assignment is to discover the origin and symbolism of this most mysterious mural. How did such a special piece get slapped onto a complex that otherwise exudes only mediocrity? When was it painted and by whom? These answers and more in the coming week.

Mural at St. Mark Presbyterian Church, Portland, OR
Photo: God, LLC

Rethinking "The Lord's Prayer" with Buckminster Fuller

2010-01-08T23:19:00.000-08:00

Here's a bizarre video segment, replete with weird glitches, featuring one of history's great polymaths, Buckminster Fuller, as he rethinks his way through The Lord's Prayer. Admittedly, it's difficult to focus on this video because the quality is so poor, but it's worth straining your ears if not your eyes.

Slayer, Nietzsche: No Apologies

2010-01-04T20:43:00.000-08:00

I had the thought to review Slayer's infamous God Hates Us All album, and I'm increasingly glad for it. First off, what better way to start out the new year. Secondly, my scant investigations into the band's history and lyrics revealed a number of online treasures, for example, did you know there is a website called darklyrics.com? That's pretty cool. And, surprise—Slayer lyrics are posted there! (as they happen to be some of the darkest lyrics this side of Charles Manson's unpublished Moleskin.)

Also, I think it only fitting that I should touch on the very band whose promo poster hangs neatly on the wall 4 feet to the left of where I typically make these posts.

I'm not telling you this to prove that I am the ultimate Slayer fan, or even a true Slayer fan (in the more dedicated sense). On the contrary, if there's one thing I realized in my brief research, it's that Slayer has a vast history that I'm mostly not privy to, and staring glassy-eyed at the abundance of information on their Wiki page, if anything, dissuaded me from delving much further into it. Suffice it to say, they have a deep catalog and have been playing ridiculously intense music for many, many years.

Did I mention this music is fiendish? Yes. Quite fiendish. Not in the sense that they actually worship the devil, as the the band maintains they do not (that's one thing I did glean from the Wiki article), but there is a reason why legions of mothers—mothers with even the most elementary detective skills—have flipped there tops over their kids listening to Slayer. It's potent stuff. And highly amoral, even by my anemic double-standards.

Actually though, if one tries and tunes their ears to all the anger-stricken yelling of singer, Tom Araya, it's difficult not to acknowledge a resounding Nietzsche influence.* One might imagine the philosopher's hopes of a more scholarly interpretation, but take the lyrics to "Darkness Of Christ" for example:

Mankind in his insatiable search for divine
Knowledge has discarded all biblical teachings

Realizing that the strength of religion is the repression of
knowledge
All structures of religion have collapsed

Life prays for death
in the wake of the horror of these revelations

It was never imagined how graphic the reality that would
be known as the end
of creation
Would manifest itself

We believe all this chaos and atrocity can be traced
Back to one single event

We hold these truths to be painfully self-evident
All men are not created equal
Only the strong will prosper
Only the strong will conquer
Only in the darkness of Christ have I realized
God Hates Us All

Okay, so maybe Nietzsche just gasped in his grave. Really it's more a sort of turbo-Nietzsche—a hybrid—morbidly focused on the most dire aspects of Nietzsche's thought, with a modern, soothsaying twist. Still, Slayer and Nietzsche, if allowed to mingle in some magnificent extra-temporal back-stage area, would surely find common ground in their disdain for Christianity.

Moreover, Nietzsche might find Slayer refreshingly sympathetic to his late-onset insanity—though, they wouldn't coddle him. Here's some lyrics from "Cast Down" (track 5 off God Hates Us All):

No one hears you
You're society's infection
I won't judge you

...

Godless he doesn't care
How you choose to destroy yourself
In a world that feeds on hate
You're left here just to waste away
In your cardboard prison, asphalt wasteland

(read the full lyrics here)

This song is apparently about society's rejects and junkies. It acknowledges that misery exists in abundance, but that it goes largely ignored. And despite what we tell ourselves, and those living on the margins of society to comfort them, there's no case to be made for why this misery is allowed to persist, or how the miserable might come to experience any redemption when all is said and done.

Slayer and Nietzsche believe in this cold reality, and see that there is no supernatural entity handing out blankets. They accept these as our circumstances, and then, perhaps, diverge from there. Neither, however would deny that religion does possess consoling powers, it's just that both see these as unfit delusions. And it angers them.

Quoting from Nietzsche's, The Anti-Christ:

In Christianity neither morality nor religion has even a single point of contact with reality. Nothing but imaginary causes ("God," "soul," "ego," "spirit," "free will"—for that matter, "unfree will"), nothing but imaginary effects ("sin," "redemption," "grace," "punishment," "forgiveness of sins"). Intercourse between imaginary beings ("God," "spirits," "souls,"); an imaginary natural science (anthropocentric; no trace of any concept of natural causes); an imaginary psychology (nothing but self-misunderstanding, interpretations of agreeable or disagreeable general feelings... "repentance," "pangs of conscience," "temptation by the devil," "the presence of God"); an imaginary teleology ("the kingdom of God," "the Last Judgement," "eternal life").

This world of pure fiction is vastly inferior to the world of dreams insofar as the latter mirrors reality, whereas the former falsifies, devalues, and negates reality.

One could easily take Nietzsche to task on the finer points of this tirade, but his passion is downright contagious.

For Slayer fans, Araya's passion too is contagious. It's amazing how many albums a single band has devoted to cursing Christianity; it's akin to standing outside the courthouse every day with a bold-faced sign until the laws change. Or like continuing to pummel someone who has long been knocked unconscious.

In no song [does Araya sound more confused in his anger] than on "Threshold" (track 6, God Hates Us All:

Never wanted bliss never wanted you
Never needed anyone I've polluted
Everything you feel everything you are
Everything you'll ever be you repulse me
It's always about you always come at me
With shit I can't identify you know it makes me
Lose my fuckin' mind all the fuckin' time
Can't control the violence that's spewing from me

This isn't the sort of thing that God, LLC readily relates to, or condones. In fact, Tom Araya would likely benefit from the in-house yoga and monthly Emotional Intelligence Training vouchers I offer all my employees. Still, I marvel at the bands continued existence (see the band's discography for an impression of how much time they've put in. It reads like—well—a Slayer discography.)

In sum, my critical assessment of God Hates Us All has affirmed my feeling that Slayer is important. Aside from their genre-defining metal, they are an important historical artifact; a dark thread without which the human tapestry would be incomplete. They represent an extreme, and they speak a certain vulgar truth. One that, while masquerading as nihilistic scum in order to bolster album sales and increase publicity, cuts to the heart of the human condition.

Listen to God Hates Us All at Lala and read the lyrics.†

Also, as I mentioned, the band has a well-realized Wiki page:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slayer

* Nietzsche. Few names have that sort of economy. Few philosophers have been more twisted by history. To be fair, the ties that I've suggested with Nietzsche are tenuous, and of course one cannot always know where someone is getting their ideas from. But a mere smattering of Nietzsche is enough to pave the way to all sorts of dark trajectories, and I'd be shocked if singer, Tom Araya, hasn't read The Anti-Christ. Perhaps, the very tendency for misinterpretation and scapegoat-ism is something that Slayer and Nietzsche have closely in common. After all, a kid commits suicide and it's Slayer's fault. A ruthless dictator plumbs the very depths of human depravity and it's Nietzsche's.

† Don't hurt yourself or others in doing so. In fact, that's God LLC's new unofficial motto, so don't come asking me about any Slayer-related homicides.

†† I'm giddy over the employment of the cross-like "dagger" symbol in this of all entries.

Magic happens. Or so it appears.

2010-01-01T02:56:00.000-08:00

Folks, it's been an interesting year. The world continues to be a place of great mystery and happy predictability. For a minute there, I thought we were entering a new era of optimism and seriousness, a time unfriendly to irony and the like. Well, I regret to report that this does not seem to be the case. Which means God, LLC shall stay in business and continue providing sometimes serious analysis, sometimes not.

"There is no history of mankind, there is only an indefinite number of histories of all kinds of aspects of human life."
-Karl Popper

Notes on Midnight Mass

2009-12-25T00:16:00.000-08:00

It wasn't planned, but Christmas Eve found my brother and I bleary-eyed and watching Midnight Mass. There's something soothing about the soft-glowing candles, the rhythmic camera fades, placid slow-pans, rich choruses and pageantry of this most holy of services. But while it began as a mere tranquilizer—something gently cupping me in my food-induced somnolence—my interest spiked when my brother told me that the Pope had been tackled earlier in the ceremony.

Having my computer nearby I looked up the incident online. Sure enough, Captian Frailty himself was downed by a red-hooded villain—a "mentally unstable" woman as it was uncommunicatively reported.

With renewed interest, I tuned back to the service on CTV.

The Pope did indeed appear shaken (as the news had stated) but he continued to look deeply despondent as the procession wore on. This solemnness was hard not to notice. It hung like a dark cloud over the ceremony leading up to and into his pope-ly address, which consisted of a predictably luddite and regretful appraisal of modernity and the impediments it poses on the path to righteousness. Basically, the speech was an appeal to the people of the world to open their minds and their hearts to God, or as he put it "Lord, open the eyes of our hearts."

Now, I don't have much experience observing Popes—I know them as slow-moving and decrepit creatures, with special transportation needs. But it would seem that if a Pope should be one thing, it's joyful. Joyful in the knowledge that they have truth, love and God on their side and everlasting life to look forward to. Benedict looked anything but. If there was passion in him, it was completely unavailable this Christmas Eve.

So where's the joy, Bene-boy? You're supposed to be a model of the endowment of religious faith, filled with Christ-love. People should look to you and think, what's his secret? how does he get along so well? But you looked like the embodiment of doubt and regret, cast of compressed resin from the bottom of Mother Teresa's guilt-stricken subconscious. I must say it didn't bode well. My advice to you would be to be a lot more like a really likable Grandpa-like figure. Draw people in with your radiance and make them feel that they too could achieve such a glow.

To avoid being any meaner to an old man who has just been accosted, allow me to continue in a different direction.

It occurred to me somewhere in my watching that if there's one thing uniting all religions at present, it's ensuring the stop-loss of wavering faithfuls and the corresponding rise of secularism. All Abrahamic religions, for example, despair at the ebbing away of the shared memes that keep their institutions vital (and subsidized!—god knows it costs a lot of money to clean the high-vaulted ceilings of the Vatican!)

In this sense, religion is engaged in an era of maintenance—stuck in a bid to convince a new generation of followers that faith is desirable to begin with. In this disparaging battle, even warring sects find common ground. Of course, if they do succeed in reversing the trend toward secularization, the fight over which doctrine should be adopted and which God worshiped will surely resume in earnest.

As it stands though—and this is evidenced by the defeated tone of Pope Benedictus' Christmas sermon (maybe too by the tackling incident)—these are hostile times for religion; we live in a markedly secular age, despite the supposed billion-odd Catholics bespeckling the earth.

Tackling incident:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_depth/8430406.stm

Midnight Mass in full:

http://vod.vatican.va/messa24122009.mov

Santa Claus: Gateway to skepticism

2009-12-14T13:54:00.000-08:00

Photo: Alan Strakey

For many of us westerners, Santa Claus—along with the Easter Bunny—represent two archetypal disillusionments we must suffer on our path from credulity to greater enlightenment. After this of course it's all downhill, and the universe becomes a place increasingly void of fantastical entities, be they paternal or bunny-like.

Still, if you've maintained as I haven't, the notion that Santa maybe really does exist, or you're simply interested in witnessing the spectacle of truth-manufacturing—oh, and you live in Brooklyn—then don't miss tonight's lecture "Beyond Belief: A Philosophical Proof of Santa Claus," presented by Open City Dialogue, at Pete's Candy Shop in Williamsburg.

Sure to employ much truthiness, the interactive lecture aims to "restore the idea of Santa Claus to those who have suffered its loss. Using historical fact, ontological argument, and inductive reasoning, we will prove the existence of Santa Claus in a passion play for the non-believer."

Petty Friday: Don't knock it till you've tried it...

2009-12-11T15:52:00.000-08:00

I followed a link that landed me at a slick propaganda machine courtesy of Scientology.org. Next thing I know, I'm about four informational videos deep being thoroughly overwhelmed by details of the life accomplishments of church founder, L. Ron Hubbard.

Proportionately underwhelmed, however, by the church's pie-in-the-sky precepts:

see Scientology.org's "Video Channel."

Postulating Hell's thermodaynamics

2009-12-10T01:49:00.000-08:00

This gem comes (via my dad!) from that bastion of uncle humor, The Edge—no, not that Edge. I thought it worthy of dissemination. Of course, I'm also an uncle now...

Below is an actual response given on a University of Arizona chemistry midterm (so sayeth the Internet!)

Bonus question: Is hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

One student's answer:

First, we need to know how the mass of hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the volume of hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.

2. If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then No. 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct ... leaving only heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting, "Oh, my God."

And on the 7th day, he decided to post...

2009-12-06T15:54:00.000-08:00

I've never been fanatical about comics. A few grabbed my interest in my pre-teen years, but I think that's just because they offered a slightly more explicit exhibition of female anatomy than did She-Ra. Suffice it to say, I would not consider myself particularly in the loop when it comes to comics, or graphic novels for that matter.

Supposedly, I should read Blankets, but I fear my biological window has closed on that opportunity, as I imagine throwing-up all over its saccharine contents. Plus it's a tome! Might as well start in on Hegel's Phenomenology if I'm gonna devote that kind of time (I know, I know, Blankets is mostly pictures...).

I've even managed to elude the Watchmen, which trusted sources tells me is well worth the read (and plenty philosophical).

All that being the case, it's no surprise that this, the most recent effort by artist/illustrator, Robert Crumb (known widely as R. Crumb), fell under my radar. It's a comic book version of Genesis—one that doesn't shy away from the "graphic nature" of the original. This means you can expect to see Eve in all her bare-chested glory, as well as Adam's you-know-whatsy.

Apparently, the removal of the proverbial fig leaf is accompanied with the insertion of a subtle layer of subterfuge on the part of Crumb, as he seems to have upset many conservatives with what they view to be a snide mistreatment of their sacred text.

Whatever his motivations, Crumb succeeds in breathing new life into the age-old fable, giving eyes and ears everywhere a chance to reacquaint themselves with the absurdity of it all.

In a way, it bears some resemblances to She-Ra's story.

Petty Friday: New Testaments (Nu/Used)

2009-12-04T17:50:00.000-08:00

It's funny to see popular design styles appropriated in bible production. Why should a text of such eminent authority have to evolve?

Discovery: New Testament (Good News for Modern Man)
© American Bible Society 1966, 1971
This groovy bible was clearly a product of its era. The copyright info page features a stamp-like insignia that reads: "GOD'S WORD FOR A NEW AGE"

The Modern Language New Testament
© Zondervan Publishing House 1969, 1970
The Modern Language New Testament or simply, "MLNT," was a popular translation apparently. It has since evolved into the The Modern Language Bible, or "MLB." Not to be confused with the New International Version, or "NIV." All three, I presume, differ considerably with the "KJV."

The Answer New Testament
© Tyndale House Publishers, Inc 1997
Copping an arty Bauhaus aesthetic.

State of the Communion

2009-11-30T03:49:00.001-08:00

Thanksgiving—more than any other holiday, I've realized—has the potential to bring about the sorts of benign vexations, the airing of which give this blog its general purpose.

I come from a big family. A big, fantastic family, full of love and—I want to say "freakish" diversity—though I know I'd be exaggerating slightly.

Each year, the majority of us gather in Spokane, WA at my aunt and uncle's beautiful lakeside home, where countless pies and casseroles converge and in the span of a couple hours, are reduced to remnants the likes of which are usually too meager to justify the use of tupperware.

At these gatherings the sheer buoyancy of the family geist is enough to keep even a space-case like myself from receding into familiar cubbies of introspection. Still, part of my mind (the part that constitutes "the back of my mind") scrawled a few napkin notes for later processing at God, LLC.

After all, what better grounds for study than a big ol' Catholic family?

Not that I was raised Catholic.

On the contrary, I was given a pretty much cursory religious education—bare bones, you might say. But, it turned out to be just enough to ensure that, try as I may, I will probably never fully escape the senseless guilt and feelings of blind duty that come bundled with a God complex.

I suppose I could always ask my mom what it's like—hers is the side with strong Catholic roots. Did I mention Thanksgivings in Spokane consist largely of my Mom's side? Where was I even going with this anyway. Oh, right... benign vexations and napkin notes.

I'm afraid, after all this build up, I'm getting cold feet about continuing with this family portrait. It's bound to be too lopsided. Suffice it to say, my only aim was to try and describe some of the frustrations that arise when you get a big group of people together, with a broad sampling of differences—especially when those differences are religious differences.

On the one hand, differing opinions give life meaning and kinesis. It's easy to forget this while in search of some mirage-like utopia.

On the other hand, though, it's individual constituents that amount to the elephantine machine that churns and croaks and takes donations and panders to the weak and hijacks minds and reshapes them into an image of itself perpetuating this credulity—you follow?

I will always choose people over ideas.

In this way, I guess I'll just have to continue venting my frustrations cryptically into the cybersphere, hoping that paint doesn't begin to un-dry.

Swiss ban minarets

2009-11-29T13:46:00.000-08:00

Too bad, they sure are perdy...

Minaret, Serrières, Switzerland
Photo: Tambako the Jaguar

Swiss voters back ban on minarets - BBC News

Christopher Hitchens, Thomas Jefferson and Ridicule

2009-11-24T13:38:00.000-08:00

A debate was held recently in London, the topic: "Is the Catholic church a force for good in the world?" I wasn't there but I've watched enough Christopher Hitchens clips on youtube to know how these things tend to go, so I wasn't surprised at the Telegraph's account of the debate.

Hitchens is a professional. On the one hand, he's meant for the stage with a sardonic wit and the ability to project his version of the truth with impressive clarity. On the other hand, and more importantly, he has a sturdy academic base, as evidenced by his erudition, professorship and biographical works. These more serious credentials (along with the above mentioned wit) collide with the sweaty impatience of an everlasting hangover to produce the sort of heroic condescensions seen here, and here.

But how does Christopher Hitchens exist in the potent form we see today? Perhaps it was his proximity to the writings of Thomas Jefferson (Hitchens has written biographies on Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Paine and George Orwell) that attuned him to the necessity of ridicule:

"Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions."
-- Thomas Jefferson, letter to Francis Van der Kemp July 30, 1816

"Nothing but free argument, raillery and even ridicule will preserve the purity of religion."
-- Thomas Jefferson, letter to Dr. Benjamin Rush. 21 April 1803

Jefferson, a deist and author of the Jefferson Bible, clearly had a point. Where reasoned argument fails, ridicule is a last resort. Or perhaps a first one...

After all, ridicule—for better and for worse—is the invisible gargoyle guarding all of societies norms. Laws provide necessary structure and recourse, but ridicule plays a fundamental, albeit amorphous role in governing all that falls outside its domain.

For example, there's no law against owning a Hummer. But ridicule has surely done its part to regulate the expanded growth of Hummer sales (in fact, they've sharply fallen off!)

Inversely, there are wide-spread laws against committing acts of violence. And yet, in cultures where violence is glorified, an unwillingness to commit violence might be met with charges of softness or cowardice.

Even in the polite world of academia, ridicule is a significant force. It acts as a deterrent. One needn't always employ it because the potential of ridicule is itself enough. It's written onto our psyches.

I have this hunch that it's ridicule that keeps the faithful from getting more specific about their beliefs, meanwhile allowing atheists like Christopher Hitchens to be outspoken and trample them in debate. Hitchens, like Thomas Jefferson, knows the utility of ridicule, and is using it to great effect.

Second thoughts

2009-11-19T02:03:00.000-08:00

Don't ask me how I come across this stuff at 2am, but I watched this video clip and found it utterly disturbing. I thought I'd post it. In doing so, I thought I'd title the post "Christian radicalism running amok" and call it a night. But that left me with a nagging feeling. What good does it do to contribute to bad air? to add to the already stifling tensions in the world at present? Why insert a link when it only leads to disheartening news? Not even news in this case. Just another anxiety-inducing tid-bit that affirms something you already know.

Maybe tomorrow I'll have something redeeming to say...

Regarding my last post...

2009-11-16T23:21:00.000-08:00

News of the Federal Reserve's crack-down on banks for the dubiousness of their overdraft fee policies was unforeseen and abrupt enough to bring a victim of such criminality to near-tears. For an ecstatic moment, it seemed as if the clouds had parted and the big-man-himself was waving his finger at me saying "You see, I told you so! For shame, for shame."

In an instant, I came to regret my every utterance on this blog and I wanted to make things right. I wanted to apologies to all the poor souls I'd surely led astray, to all the radio stations I'd ever offended. This fervency proved fleeting, but I went on thinking along these lines for the rest of the day... and into the next—UNTIL! I realized the true nature of this occurrence...

It happened like this. I was just settling into my chair—new lease of life—ready to begin praise of His almightiness in a last-ditch attempt at favoritism, when I noticed the numbers... Let me explain.

It seems, in three years—three joyful years of apostatizing and bestowing the merits of skepticism on this blog—I have posted exactly 9 entries each year. This is evidenced by the blog archive scheme positioned to the right of this post (which, it's worth noting, should now indicate 10 posts for 2009 as opposed to 9 [at least at the time of this post]).

On a personal note, to this I say—Not bad! Twenty-seven posts in thirty-three months isn't shabby, especially, considering I never gave myself any sort of quota. On a demonic note, however, I say, this does not bode well...

Tracking with me? That's three 9's. Three 9's that, when turned upside down, make for three 6's! And as Wikipedia tells us, these particular characters when presented in succession amount to a certain number, a certain number of a certain someone who—as it turns out, aparently has a sense of humor, as I interpret this to be a direct message from BEELZEBUB HIMSELF!

Wow! Whoa is me! A personal acknowledgment from Satan, a nod of approval, the equivalent of a Hallmark card from Hell (Hellmark^® card, count it!) saying "Keep up the good work!"

And so, my hungry readers, you must pardon me for last week's knee-jerk reaction and the resulting polemic. It was all false on account of this fiendish prank, and the sentimentality that it bore I'll wear like a cheap smock I got at Old Navy that's short, wide and unflattering.

Stay tuned for regularly-scheduled programming...

STOP THE PRESSES! GOD, LLC ADMITS TO AN INTERVENTIONIST GOD

2009-11-12T12:42:00.000-08:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091112/ap_on_bi_ge/us_fed_overdraft_fees

MASTER OF MORMONISM!

2009-11-10T03:52:00.000-08:00

...my idea for an ironic Mormonism tee:

Jesus and Satan "Spirit Brothers" according to Mormons

2009-11-10T00:07:00.000-08:00

Eh, why not? It's no crazier a claim than countless others found in various, older (and thereby surely more credible) religious texts.

Jesus or Zeus?

Of course, nowadays the trend is toward a more figurative reading of things like Genesis.

But what will become of the world's faiths as adherents increasingly look on their texts as fable?

That is, as religions continue to transform to stay relevant—at what point do they become akin to Greek mythology?

Or will MORMONISM be the next rung on faith's evolutionary ladder?

I sincerely hope not. For myself, and for the people of this website:

http://www.exmormon.org

I found this thread particularly distressing:

http://www.exmormon.org/mormon/mormon311.htm

Heavenly Churches

2009-11-03T21:06:00.000-08:00

Are fancy churches a testament to God's glory, or Man's ego? Or both? Whatever the case, there is something about church building that seems to tap into an architect's sense of otherness.

Notre Dame du Haut – Le Corbusier
Photo: 黃毛

Church of Light - Tadao Ando
Photo: Chris He

Pilgrimage Church - Gottfried Böhm
Photo: seier+seier

Grundtvig Memorial Church - P. V. Jensen Klint
Photo: seier+seier

Bagsværd Church – Jørn Utzon
Photo: James Woodward

St. Mary's Cathedral, Tokyo - Tange Kenzo
Photo: Shinjuku1

Notre Dame du Haut – Le Corbusier
Photo: scarletgreen

Notre Dame du Haut – Le Corbusier
Photo: scarletgreen

Notre Dame du Haut – Le Corbusier
Photo: Rory Hyde

St. Mary's Cathedral, San Francisco - Pier Luigi Nervi
Photo: Thomas Hawk

Petty Friday: Christian Rock Radio

2009-10-16T00:11:00.000-07:00

A few weeks back, Bryan Free—who should probably seek royalties for every time his name gets dropped on this blog—called to say he was listening to Christian rock radio and that I should tune in. Well—I suppose, come to think of it, that's not why he called, he was following up about something else entirely—but most of our conversation was spent trying to recount the call signs and frequencies of various Christian radio stations and lamenting Christian music at large.

We both decided I should probably lend an ear to some recent Christian rock entries and review them at God, LLC. A music review, I thought—that'll be a first!

Now, to be honest, I started this post a few weeks back, so these remarks are in reference to whatever tripe was being played on Air 1 Radio (90.3 FM) at that time. Luckily, I can count on contemporary Christian music not to evolve too quickly.

Let's start with the website:

The Air 1 website, complete with distressed background effects, is adorned with "trendy" graphics reminiscent of those maybe seen in a Zummiez II clearance bin over a decade ago. And yet, the abundance of Web 2.0 widgets and cyber accoutrements smack of a recent redesign. Indeed, the trifecta of plug-and-play self-promotion (MySpace, Facebook, and Twitter) are all given ample real estate alongside YouTube, Flickr, and iPhone App links. But wait, here's something—a GIVE NOW link! (I'm seriously considering this for GOD, LLC).

To the right of these links, and in accordance with web geometry, the featured band, MIKESCHAIR, appears in their press photo to be a little more aware of the times. As for their music, I regret to say it bodes horribly. It's like a bad parody of a Christian rock band, but then again, that's the essential quality that seems to give an otherwise ragtag genre it's unity.

As feeble as MIKESCHAIR is however, at least they have the good sense to "play it safe." For it's when these groups undertake experiment that ears and sensibilities truly suffer.

Take the band Skillet, for example. Their song "Savior" features guitars so processed that it sounds like bricks being stacked to reconstruct various Godsmack rhythms. Sure, that may be a subjective quip, but with verse lyrics like "It's time to re-decide your deophobic mind", it's tough to favor any aspect of their music.

But I've digressed; I wasn't finished describing the website.

Another feature of the Air 1 homepage is the "Tell Us Your Story" section, where listeners are meant to share how it was they came to accept Jesus as Lord:

"I was stressed out about college. The day before i prayed i was almost in a 'panic attack' and i felt like i couldn't get things done. Later that night I prayed and asked if God would meet me half..."

This is where I forwent the opportunity to "read more."

Instead, I directed my attention to a section advertising "THE REVOLUTION!" with subsequent links like "support THE REVOLUTION!", "need prayer?", and "chat with a spiritual coach". I soon learned that Air 1 is "a non-denominational, non-profit, listener supported radio network" that believes that "there is a resurrection of both the saved and the lost—the saved to eternal life in heaven, the lost to hell." Does this not land one in a particular denomination? or would I be laughed out of Sunday school?

Also, how many spurious translations does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a verse like this:

"The Great Commission of the church is to go into the entire world and preach the Gospel to every person, using every modern means of communication available to us." (Mark 16:15, Luke 14:23, Matt 28:19-20, Acts 1:7-8, Mark 16:15-16)

I don't know either, but it explains the Twitter feed.

Oh, the music! I must be subconsciously avoiding it...

What is it about Christian rock that can be so grotesque? What it is about it that makes my skin literally want to crawl off my back, literally! For one, it's weird to hear all the novel sounds of popular secular music, including it's often palpable sexual verve, re-appropriated for the purpose of worship. You end up, on occasion, with a male crooner who, in serenading Jesus with a love song, is at the same time trying to sound sexy, a la Gavine Rossdale's, "Glycerine." Something about that doesn't sit quite right.

Or take Jeremy Camp for example; Christian music's answer to Nickel Back (not that the world was in need of such an answer). Sure, he may look like a vacant-eyed amalgam of every men's hair model I ever saw in one of those glossy hair-style guides at Super Cuts, but does that mean his music sucks? Probably — Apparently — Yes — yes it does. In fact, there seems to be a very concrete connection between his particular hairdo/soul-patch combo and the production of real sucky music. Suffice it to say, big guitars pounding out Nu-Rock rhythms alongside horrendously pouty vocals, atop the least inspired drum performance I've ever heard, does not for a good song make.

As I'm writing this I'm starting to feel bad. It's like making fun of retarded people or something. Even though I was raised in a more or less secular household, my mom use to say, "If not but for the grace of God, there go I." This is of course something you say in reference to the less fortunate, but it has a unique resonance with me. I prefer to substitute the word "God" with something like "chance" or "experience," transforming the sentence into an acknowledgment of the fact that we are all a product of our environment—something that, in many cases, we have little control over.

With this in mind, it's tough to be too hard on anybody, even Christian rockers. But for the sake of finishing what's been started, I shall continue down this path of malice as it's coming all-too-naturally, I'm afraid.

First, however, I'll pay a compliment to Christian rockers. That being, they really can sing! I know, I know, they all sang in church—but they know how to harmonize, they can create very rich harmony. It's just too bad that they use these talents to reproduce Blink 182 choruses with a decade's latency (listen to Reliant K's, "The Best Thing" for proof). In fact, that's the one thing that is so excruciatingly apparent if ever you tune in to one of these stations; not only is everything so unbelievably rehashed, but it's all from a recently bygone era. This tendancy has left me convinced that, in some cosmic dualism, every successful secular act born into the sphere, has it's own less compelling, less artistic, suckier, latent Christian counterpart. Thankfully we all have a choice between raw cane sugar, and Christian Splenda®.

But how to account for this lack of artistry?

Dave Bazan, a vaguely Christian artist who's music I love, may have some insight in this direction. Here's a line from his song, "Selling Advertising":

I know it's hard to be original
In fact nothing scares me more
Because Jesus only let's me do
What has been done before

(Having reminded myself of Dave Bazan, I want to make a distinction between legitimate artists who are also Christians [I've known at least one of these] and the popular Christian artists that I'm doing an amazing job of stereotyping!)

That said, I think there's something to this Dave Bazan line. After all, Christianity demands selflessness and service to others. This is God's will. Your work, as a Christian, is assigned to you from-on-high, and futzing around with your guitar in your bedroom, trying to figure out original chords, much less how you're going to become an individual, has got little to do with it. Unless, of course, you're not working in vain, i.e., your planning to better spread the gospel!

The painful consequence of this, however, is the utter singularity of song meaning on stations like Air 1. Not only is every last song about a love affair with God, but there's so little variance to the manner in which the topic of God is approached that it takes listening to about three songs to realize the formula. After that, you'll be able to anticipate the ends to all the lines in whatever song is on deck, or at least write your own. It's kinda fun actually! Careful though, this may do ir-reperrable damage to your psyche.

Tune in! >> http://www.air1.com/

The Problem with Religions Blogs

2009-10-13T22:41:00.000-07:00

The problem with maintaining blogs is that they are the sort of thing that one intends to update regularly.

That said, a second problem is that they don't lend themselves to well considered, well researched argument. Take that statement for example. I don't intend to give any support to that claim.

Maybe, in truth, the problem is me. Or rather that my personality, doesn't lend itself to well considered, well researched argument. I'd prefer to pass this blame on to the blogging community at large (not you Bryan, there's nothing frivolous about your blog). After all, it's a communication format that myself and nameless others have chosen precisely for it's immediacy.

But can you have both immediacy and well considered, well researched content? Probably not. Why even try—after all, if I wanted to immerse myself in focused research I'd probably have stayed in school (maybe there they would have taught me how to maintain credibility with my readers!).

Or maybe I'd be agonizing over a book, or at least procrastinating a paper (e.g. Beverly Hills Cop: A Model for Secular Virtue).

But, alas, I'm blogging, which spans roughly five paragraphs and is about as formal as a hawaiian shirt, albeit, neatly pressed.

I suppose I'm saying all this because I often find myself with an urge to write about a topic that I know relatively little about, or that would require much too much research in order to arrive at an opinion worthy of dissemination.

What I've realized, however, is that I hold certain opinions regardless. I walk around with them every day, sharing them among family, friends and Apple store employees. Never mind that the majority of these opinions are potentially bogus, if not least uninformed, by any standard of rigor.

It's from this defective springboard that I launch today's nominal topic: Religion and Breeding

On second thought, better make it tomorrow's topic, it's gotten late.

Petty Friday: Head Trades Meth for God

2009-04-03T12:18:00.000-07:00

Two members of Korn have now gone evangelical (Fieldy and Head). In his memior, Save Me From Myself, Head says, "Immediately after church, after raising my hand to accept Christ in my life for real this time, I went home, put on a movie for Jennea, and went into my master closet, opened the safe, and grabbed the best bag of meth I had in there. I snorted a line, then sat there on the floor, a rolled-up bill in my right hand, and prayed..."

Now, in my age and wisdom I'm finding it harder and harder to be an asshole for the sake of making jokes, a change which, believe me, I welcome like a staph infection. It's this annoying tick called empathy which has the tendency to suck the life-blood from 9-out-of-10 potentially funny remarks (at least the sort that I would consider funny). What is more, I celebrate this "forbidden humor" when I hear it from others—in fact, I revel in it. Arrgh...

This familiar standoff is largely the reason for Petty Friday, which I've never explained. Petty Friday at God LLC is (supposedly) the one day a week where I trade my preferred brand of self-righteousness for the one most conducive to humor—arrogance! This week, however, I couldn't have put it better than James Parker at Slate Magazine...

Read Nü Testaments and discover the "true" end of grunge.

Need A New Heart? I Thought So...

2009-01-24T14:58:00.000-08:00

Billy Graham Quells The Crazies

2009-01-24T13:14:00.000-08:00

Age and wisdom can be seductive. Here is a beautiful sermon by Billy Graham at age 80. He's offering parting remarks at a 1998 TED conference (TED stands for Technology, Entertainment & Design).

Compare this with his more outspoken appearance on Woody Allen's talk show 30 years prior and see how soft, ambiguous language (and humility) is better suited for winning over an audience of assumed unbelievers.

Christianity as Utility

2008-12-29T10:36:00.000-08:00

Does Africa need Christianity? Recovering Christian, Matthew Parris, argues that it does—with his heart, not his brain.

Read As an atheist, I truly believe Africa needs God, from TimesOnline.

Strange Holiday Lights Displays

2008-12-24T12:01:00.000-08:00

As much as I dislike the Flying Spaghetti Monster, this one belongs at MoMA.

(From Slate Magazine's "America's Weirdest Holiday Lights Displays" slideshow.)

Petty Friday

2008-08-14T17:13:00.000-07:00

Ode to a Flower

2008-08-14T11:30:00.000-07:00

Blah, Francis Collins... (Petty Friday?)

2008-07-25T20:00:00.000-07:00

I started to write this entry a while back but stopped short of posting it for fear of being unfair to its subject. After all he did play a monumental role in helping to unravel the humane genome, and so who am I to smear someone of such high repute. Furthermore, I still have yet to read his book The Language Of God: A Scientist Presents Evidence for Belief, so really, I'm in no better position now to criticize.

But I was reminded again of Francis Collins upon listening back to an interview (the same interview that nagged me to write this post in the first place), which featured the famed geneticist, on Terry Gross' characteristically hospitable radio show, Fresh Air (NPR). The discussion was part two in a two-part series addressing the compatibility of science and religion, the first of which featured an interview with evolutionary biologist and renowned atheist, Richard Dawkins. I've provided links to the two interviews below so there's no need for me to reconstruct them here, but I would like to comment on what I perceive to be a distinct difference in attitude between the two eminent scientists; a difference that to me illustrates the lack of intellectual rigor that results in unlikely labels like "Evangelical Christian Geneticist" (not to be confused in this case with Christian Scientist).

Now it's an admittedly murky idea to try and articulate, and I wince at the thought of sounding mean—but there is something deficient in Francis Collins's reasoning. Something off, something kinda childish, something bible camp-counsiloresque about his demeanor. When compared with Richard Dawkins—and to be sure, Dawkins possesses exceptional powers of persuasion—Collins sounds naive and whimsical, much like anyone who babbles on about what God might/maybe/could embody. Like, "Gosh, would you look at all those stars... kinda makes you think, don't it... [insert token spiritual digression here]" The only nuance being that Collins thinks God's invisible fingerprints are all over our DNA (a far cry from the dust and bone accounts of Genesis.)

In this respect, Collins falls neatly in line with a dead-sea-scrolls-worth of religious faithfuls who've found new and creative ways of positing God's existence in the face of scientific discovery, which continues to neuter claims made by their sacred texts. From Copernicus to Galileo, Newton to Darwin, where religion is concerned, science is corrosive, and it's taken the craft of language to go the necessarily poetic lengths to rescue popular religion from sheer charlatanism.

Am I alleging that Francis Collins himself is a charlatan? No—I'd imagine he believes wholeheartedly in the arguments he makes for Christianity. Am I saying he's incapable of advancing science? Clearly not, as he has in a monumental way. I am however calling into question his intelectual rigor, and suggesting that the latest spin he's put on spirituality says nothing new. Science has been revealing profundities in nature for millennia, and there will always be those who take those discoveries to be proof of God's existence, when really, the reason for the splendor of the genome is no more explicable than that of the vastness of the cosmos, however much one might wish for an explanation.

As for Dawkins, maybe I'm giving him too much credit. Maybe the seductiveness in his voice—his token eloquence, are merely reflections of the grace and honesty of his arguments.

Listen to both interviews on NPR's website:
Richard Dawkins interview w/ Terry Gross
Francis Collins interview w/ Terry Gross

Holy, Holy Rollers!

2008-07-08T20:20:00.000-07:00

I recently finished an outstanding book that shed light on so many lurking suspicions I've amassed over the years regarding religion, cults, religious cults—don't ask me why I'm being redundant here, any one of these terms should suffice.

The book is called "Holy Rollers: Murder and Madness in Oregon's Love Cult" and its authors T. McCracken and Robert B. Blodgett relay (in obsessively-researched detail) the story of the rise and fall of the Holy Roller cult that emerged in Corvallis, Oregon around 1903—spawning mayhem in the decade to follow.

Led by the well-endowed, jesus-wannabe Edmund Creffield—or "Joshua" as his flock knew him—the Holy Rollers spent much of their early days rolling around on the floor of their church in a crazed state of worship. Joshua had told them that he was a prophet and that they were God's Anointed; he had "received instruction from on high" to lead them to where the restoration of all things would take place, at which point the world would be as it was when God first created it.

But in the meantime, this meant a whole lot of rolling around and begging for forgiveness. And so, exhaustive prayer services were held sometimes lasting 24 hours, 12 hours if it was a short service. God's Anointed were encouraged to shun their spiritually impure family members and burn all their "vain" possessions (which I believe included some chickens, a dog and a cat...).

Making use of the convenient device of divine revelation, Creffield would soon convince his flock that God no longer wanted them to wear clothes (though they were to continue to spend much time on the floor together) and that they were only to eat food that he himself had blessed. This way they would "know cold" and "know hunger" but also remain weak and dizzy from all that rolling.

Creffield's method of breaking down and rebuilding his subjects was an incremental process, but the key was keeping everyone convinced that he was in direct communication with God. Any dissent among his followers was fiercely rooted out, and the accused were banished from his church with the promise that God would smite them.

The particulars of these cult-leader/cult-cog dynamics were of imminent interest to me in reading this book. I've always maintained a loose sketch in my mind of how one individual, or a group of individuals, may have managed to pull off an extaordinary hoax (such as, say, Christianity) but to have the inner-workings of a failed Christian off-shoot such as the Holy Rollers, rigorously profiled and thereby exposed... well, it only served to fan the flames of my imagination and lend greater plausibility to such a senario.

More than anything though, this book contains great story telling—and in so far as it does, every effort has been made to make an already sensational story, as sensational as possible.

Highly Recommended » Holy Rollers: Murder and Madness in Oregon's Love Cult

What about you, oh loyal readership. Does anybody have any arm-chair ideas on how any of the world religions came about? Half-baked? Quarter-baked? Purely to satasfy my curiousity...

Petty Friday

2008-05-30T15:52:00.000-07:00

Comic by Brad Neeley. Visit creasedcomics.com for some amazing bite-sized humor. Seriously, like Butterfinger BB's...

In Atheism We Trust?

2008-05-01T12:21:00.000-07:00

According to the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life, godlessness is on the rise. Most notably, the percentage of young people (18 to 29-year-olds) who claim to have no religious affiliation has reached 25%, up 11% from a similar survey conducted in 1986. (See pewforum.org for the full report [and for interesting statistical tidbits like the "Percentage of Each State's Population that affiliates with Unaffiliated."])

But with Unbelievers on the rise, and Atheism receiving new branding from people like Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, Christopher Hitchens, Daniel Dennett and others now emerging to disrupt the absurd placidity between Believers and Non-Believers, a certain portion of the "Unaffiliated" are getting anxious. It's an anxiety and excitement that I relate to readily; one born of the natural and healthy question "Okay, what's next?" That is to say, if you understand and accept the unlikelihood of the existence of a god that cares about you, hears your prayers and will—when comes the unique time and place of your demise—hold you accountable for the choices you made in your life in accordance with the instructions he left for you on the proverbial kitchen-countertop-of-life, before he went out on vacation (which seems like an eternity to us, but is really just a weekend to him)—if you regard that as being a little far-fetched and unworthy of your lifelong commitment and devotion, then—what next?

To some—particularly those who were raised religious I would imagine—the answer is something like "well, I see the value of Church, particularly in its ability to foster community, so why can't something like that still exist, only we won't worship God, we'll just get together?" This is an uplifting notion and an idea that excites me personally as a person who values community; but when it comes to uniting the words "Atheism" and "Church" I think it's important to bear in mind what the word "Atheism" is meant to describe, which is simply "a lack of belief in God." Let's not confuse it with anything more than that. You may be able to wed yourself to religion in unhealthy ways, but atheism can do nothing for you—it's kind of implicit in the definition I think. It's not an object of worship but a decision one arrives at, from where, one must decide where to go. In that way it's no sort of destination, it's a starting point, a clean slate, free from the nonsense snuck into to enclaves of our collective history. The last thing we "Unbelievers" need in the uphill battle to see that "Atheisism" does not become some sort of slur, is for it to be easily parodied (see: South Park, Richard Dawkins).

Then again, do I really care if the word takes on an even more pungent stigma, no, not really. We'll call it something else if need be, something more neutral. But I happen to like the word "Atheism". It's pleasing to me. And besides, it'll come up first in the phone book (an obvious bonus!).

So, my hope is that the word "Atheism" can be reserved to describe the negation of a "belief in God(s)", rather than one incorporated into some arched moniker (auster, and sans sarif most likely) denoting the new entrance to the former Church of Christ, now called—what—"Church of Modern Day Atheism?"

Maybe what we're really looking for is this.

Or this.

Read If God Is Dead, Who Gets His House? by Sean McManus, nymag.com, for more on burgeoning Atheism.

What's good about religion?

2008-04-17T10:13:00.000-07:00

Recently, I've seen the muscle behind my atheism wither. This guy—Pat Condell, English stand-up comedian/writer/playwrite—had it surging with blood and vitality. He spits venom, which some find upsettig—but if you think about where Condell would fall on a scale of Non-Religious vs. Religious extremism, it would probably look something like this:
That is to say, humoristic jabs and thinly-veiled contempt can be seen as quite moderate when compared with blood-soaked fists and outright intolerance. Besides, it takes outspoken individuals to rattle people from complacency and promote dialogue.

Enjoy (or disavow) other Pat Condell entries on YouTube where he is currently the second most-subscribed-to-user of all time.

Mother Teresa Doubts

2007-08-27T18:22:00.000-07:00

"...for me, the silence and the emptiness is so great, that I look and do not see, — Listen and do not hear..." -Mother Teresa in a letter to Rev. Michael van der Peet, her "spiritual confidant"

See "Mother Teresa's Crisis Of Faith" by David Van Biema (Time Magazine, August 23rd, 2007)

God's invisible hand, at it again...

2007-06-20T10:51:00.000-07:00

"Science is littered with once-mysterious facts first imputed to God and later found out to be explicable solely through natural processes."

(From Jerry Coyne's review of Michael J. Behe's new book, "The Edge of Evolution: The Search for the Limits of Darwinism")

In the scientific community, to be both a biologist and a creationist is exceptionally rare. Still, there are some—one might call them "Tenacious B's"—who lend their scientific credibility to the failing fight for institutionalized recognition of Intelligent Design; Michael Behe is of this type. The reviewer—scientist, Jerry Coyne—does a great job summerizing/dismantling Behe's arguments, and helps to clarify some common misconceptions regarding evolution.

Read "The Great Mutator: A Review by Jerry Coyne"

Other quotes from the review...

"It is more accurate, then, to call mutations "indifferent" rather than "random": the chance of a mutation happening is indifferent to whether it would be helpful or harmful."

"The explanation of seeming design by solely materialistic processes was Darwin's greatest achievement, and a major source of discomfort for those holding the view that nature was designed by God."

Petty Friday: The Creation Museum and Hogwarts

2007-06-01T11:37:00.000-07:00

May 28th marked the opening of the long-awaited (6,000 years to be exact) Creation Museum in Petersburg, Kentucky. The $27 million venture—an achievement of the Answers in Genesis ministry—boasts 60,000 square feet of walk-through history featuring realistic scenery, exotic animals, fossils, life-size models, "computer-generated visual effects," and animatronic dinosaurs (made to graze amongst prehistoric boys and girls, and presumably board Noah’s Ark before the flood) designed by the same Universal Studios exhibit director who did Jaws and King Kong. These attractions and more were all created in the spirit of "bringing the pages of the bible to life" and proving the literal truth of Genesis. Finally the world as it really is, and was!

Also soon to emerge is "The Wizarding World Of Harry Potter" [Potter fans froth], a J.K. Rowling-approved theme park promising to be "the world's first immersive Harry Potter themed environment."

'Potter-world' may cream the Creation Museum in first-year attendance (an upset that should have biting significance for fundamentalists) but at least the CM concerns itself with historical 'truth.'

***

(Potter fans, read: I may have used Hogwarts as a device here, the park isn't set to open til 2009. I'm sorry if I misled you. It's in Orlando, Florida, so you can start camping out now)

www.creationmuseum.org
Edward Rothstein, "Adam and Eve in the Land of the Dinosaurs" The New York Times May 24th, 2007

"Source of life..." he continued.

2007-05-14T11:45:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, in a speech delivered at my younger brother’s college graduation ceremony in Tacoma, Washington, I noticed the school’s President attempting to lead his audience in prayer. Not a typical prayer, mind you—though it did assume the unmistakable tone and diction of invocation—but this was more of a politically correct sort of modern-day adaptation of something resembling a prayer. The interesting bit was the preface he gave before embarking. He said something to the effect of: “Today, we have many ways of defining the powers that be. Some call those powers God. Others say that they can be found in the extraordinary and breathtaking constructs of nature. And some say those powers are evident in the best of human kind… Now, let us take a moment and reflect...”

“Source of life…” he continued, leading into the most diplomatic and amorphous of ‘prayers.’

‘Source of life?’ I thought. Ha! Only when someone is bending over backwards to be p.c. do phrases like ‘source of life’ come into play in this context (find and replace ‘God’ with ‘Source of life’—that’s cute). But this was a manifestation of something that I’ve been thinking about lately:

What is the proper/acceptable role of prayer/spirituality in a society that is clearly shying from religious ideals and moving gradually toward that of the non-theist?

In this case, the adapted prayer, which effectively transcended denomination and avoided reference to any given faith altogether, was actually inclusive of non-believers. I imagine there was a small minority of attendees who were miffed that the school President didn’t recognize God, the one true ‘God,’ but the general feeling was a good one and a nostalgic one. As people bowed their heads, shut their eyes, or became otherwise silent and attentive, it was clear that the ears of 8,000 people were somehow tuned to the distinct and familiar tone of religious oration, and though I am an atheist and took the speaker to be (maybe) non-religious too, I appreciated the opportunity to reflect and take part in what felt like a viable kind of shared spirituality—something that Atheists typically do value despite characterizations to the contrary.

Dawkin's 'Scale of Belief'

2007-05-06T23:00:00.000-07:00

Not only is Richard Dawkin's proposed 'Scale Of Belief' well constructed and useful, I think it apt to couple it with Bertrand Russell's 'Celestial Teapot' analogy. So many of the commonly used 'god-analogies' created and employed by non-believers (unicorns, flying spaghetti monster, etc.) are at worst condescending, and at best aesthetically unpleasing. Russell's teapot analogy, on the other hand, is elegant and serves its purpose better than most.

The parable goes: Somewhere between Earth and Mars there is a perfect china teapot in an elliptical orbit around the sun.

The point of this analogy is to show that while this claim may be difficult to disprove (like certain claims about God), the person making the claim would undoubtedly have a difficult time garnering support for such a belief. And while it would hardly be worth anyone's time to try and disprove this propostion (which probability seems to build a strong case against) the burden of proof would nonetheless rest on the claim-staker, were it of any consequence.

Claims about God, while similarly far-fetched, are considered to be of ultimate consequence. Still, it is not the responsibility of scientists or philosophers, or Safeway cashiers to disprove them, just as it is not anyone's responsibility to disprove the infinite number fathomable possibilities.

With Russell's analogy in mind, here is Dawkin's 'Scale of Belief.'

1. Strong theist. 100 per cent probability of God. In the words of C.G. Jung, "I do not believe, I know."

2. Very high probability but short of 100 per cent. De facto theist. "I cannot know for certain, but I strongly believe in God and live my life on the assumption that he is there."

3. Higher than 50 per cent but not very high. Technically agnostic but leaning toward theism. "I am very uncertain, but I am inclined to believe in God."

4. Exactly 50 per cent. Completely impartial agnostic. "God's existence and non-existence are exactly equiprobable."

5. Lower than 50 per cent but not very low. Technically agnostic but leaning towards atheism. "I don't know whether God exists but I'm inclined to be skeptical."

6. Very low probability, but short of zero. De facto atheist. "I cannot know for certain but I think God is very improbable, and I live my life on the assumption that he is not there."

7. Strong atheist. "I know there is no God, with the same conviction Jung 'knows' there is one."

Dawkins says, "I'd be surprised to meet many people in category 7, but I include it for symmetry with category 1, which is well populated."

Petty Friday

2007-05-04T09:56:00.000-07:00

Recomended reading...

2007-04-29T20:36:00.000-07:00

Here are some recent articles that give a feel for the rising temperature of religious debate the world over.

'Through a glass, darkly', by Jeff Sharlet, is an energetic insider's account of the zealous "Maximalist" movement. Think of it as a sort of backpacking-through-the-outback-of-American-Fundementalism with Jeff Sharlet as your undercover guide. Highly recomended.

'In the beginning' is a special report, from The Economist on the heated debate over creation and evolution gone global.

'We'd be better off without religion', by Ruth Glendhill, offers needed perspective on a debate that took place in London on March 28th, at which, the motion was "We'd be better off without religion."

Additionally, The DNA of Religious Faith, by David P. Barash, is a long, somewhat tedious article (with the sort of religious analogies that grate, save that one about the teapot), featuring some great overview, a few pearls of Atheist wisdom and some insight into a newly-charted dimension of the religious debate.

Religion... Benign? Nope.

2007-04-29T15:04:00.000-07:00

In response to Bryan’s last post, I’m attempting to address the general question: “Is religion really a contributor to the ails of the world?” The implied answer, I’m taking to be “No— religion is benign and the real factors are things like poverty, envy, greed, lust for power, limited space, etc.—the cornucopia of inequity and cause-for-conflict in the world.

While these are all token contributors, religion—in countless cases throughout history—has provided the framework for war, and it continues to play a specified role.

With respect to current events, I might ask, “What is the root cause of what we are reluctant to call ‘Religious War’ in the middle-east, preferring euphemisms like ‘Sectarian Violence’ and ‘War On Terror.’” Surly those previously mentioned factors play a significant role in these disputes—and the root issues are confounded by rapid changes brought on by globalization—but the primary justification for bloodshed in the middle-east is inarguably faith-based.

Take the Iraq War for example. The opposition (as we have been forced to learn) finds cause for war in the founding doctrines of Islam, which are intrinsically at odds with any non-conforming value system, explicitly promoting hostility and violence—and martyrdom—in pursuit of its ends. (***While it's worth mentioning that the majority of Muslims are indeed tolerant, this is an unlikely bi-product of the lessons found in the Koran***)

Similarly, the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict is a religious battle that happens to be a dispute over territory (substitute “holy land”).

George Bush too, confers God on matters of war.

Religion then, from all sides, is used as a core justification for war, and in this sense, any suggestion that either conflict is not so much about religion, but instead "land" or “terror” or “hatred of our way of life” is a dangerous way of skirting the obvious.

The issue, as I see it, is that we have a normative way of insulating religious claims from the necessary degrees of scrutiny that govern all other ideas, including those immeasurably less consequential. Ignoring the role religion plays in today's conflicts, is yet another way of shielding all faiths from accountability for their beliefs.